[lollie]

My boyfriend has told me that when we have sex, it doesn't feel the same as it used to. He said it feels too loose?

I was just wondering what caused that, and what I can do to change it?
thanks

[Guest]

I am a virgin myself and have ever experienced the joy of sex and you must be lucky to have a friend who does it and I think you have to use some prescribed methods / techniques and even masturbating. You can masturbate hid so that that can stimulate him more and help him reach an orgasm. I am inexperienced, amateur.

I imagine I will make my boy ecstatic but unsure since I have never done it though I am 21, fully mellow and mature for all that

[Hopeless Dork]

Firstly, make sure you are doing kegal excersizes... you can google proper technique.. it will improve sensations for both you and him. You can also do them DURING sex... when you learn to work your muscles down there you can make some awesome sensations for both you and him by squeezing and relaxing your muscles.

There is also the possibility of you just being a little overlubricated which can make things more slippery, etc... if you are using lube... i'd stop using it so much, if you are just naturally getting more wet... not much you can do about that, but perhaps dabbing off with a towel if its really out of hand wetness.. but most guys enjoy their woman's sex to be hot and wet... so i wouldn't worry about that so much other than reducing lubricant if you are using any.

You could also try ribbed condoms to give it a little more friction...

There are also sexual positions that you can use that that optimize stimulation: doggy style, missionary with your legs over his shoulders, missionary with your legs extended in the air, closed or crossed or a mixture of opening and closing them can make things extra frictional

My boyfriend has a big penis and I've found that laying on my back in missionary with my legs wide open, makes it a little easier to accomadate him at first until i get use to it... then its anything goes But that being the case I think the wide spread legs missionary is probably the position that leaves you the most open, so I'd avoid that one for a little bit and try some others like above to feel him more.

Just play around and have fun trying new things til you find a position that works best for the two of you. I have a problem with the way he came out and said what he did, hopefully he was saying your vagina is 'loose' that could hurt a womans feelings... its not a blame game and hopefully he isn't making you feel bad about it because you could just as easily consider him too small as he does you too loose.

If you love each other, hopefully it was said tactfully and in a way that he wants to try new things to experience and give you better feelings and not just him being a jerk.

[sofi-chan]

Sorry but what does "kegal excersizes" mean?? :/

[WildChild]

Back in the 1940s Dr Alfred Kegel developed a method of strengthening the PC muscles. He used a biofeedback device with them. At present I think the best thing is a Kegelmaster but you can do them unassisted. The PC muscles or pubococcygeus muscles are the abdominal floor, they hold in place your uterus, bladder and rectum as well keep your vagina toned and responsive.

The easiest way to locate the PCs is to stop the flow during urination. You don't want to do this repeatedly as it can bck urine up and actually contribute to UTIs but it is the best way to find those muscles. Doing unassisted kegels will help strengthen but using a good resistance device is more effective. To start unassisted is fine. Basically you squeeze, hold a couple seconds and release. If done properly, this does not involve your gluts or abs. You can tell if you getting the PCs by laying down and inserting a finger either into your vagina or anus, when you contract the PCs you will feel it internally.

It is best to start with maybe 30 reps at a time a couple times a day and work up to sets of 100. The great thing about these is that you can do then anywhere. No one will know that while standing in line at the grocery you are doing kegels. It's recommended to do them in different posistions and even while moving around. Once you get the hang of it, just get in the habit of doing them throughout the day. Also work on being able to do longer hold times. Done properly you will have been urinary control, more vaginal control both to be tighter and to release or relax, you will also enhance your sexual responsiveness.

[oxy-moron]

Hi
there can be be a noticable difference in tightness between an excited vagina and a non excited one.
This is due to swelling from increased blood flow in erectile tissue. Get him to work you up more first.