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  • amino_vera
    Junior Member
    • Feb 2011
    • 1

    my boyfriend doesn't satisfy me

    i feel like whenever my bf and i have sex, its always about him. once hes done, its over. he just goes to sleep. its not like once im done i just stop and go to sleep, obviously i would continue until he's finished too. i've tried telling him before how i felt but its hard to explain. it seems like he doesn't even want to try to make me orgasm. i feel frustrated and hurt and like he's being really selfish. all he cares about is his own needs. shouldn't he want to make me feel good as well? i feel like if a guy truly cares about you he would focus on your needs too. i've tried telling him how i feel, but i don't think he gets it. it just feels like im asking him to make me orgasm, like im forcing him to do it, and he doesn't want to do it himself simply for the fact of pleasing me. there have been so many times where i've solely focused on him but he has never done the same for me. i just need some help in telling him how i feel because i don't exactly know how to word it without feeling like im asking or forcing him to want to please me
  • stressed
    Veteran Member
    • Jun 2009
    • 1914

    It seems like you've already expressed your problem but he doesn't listen/make an effort. You can try to cut down on sex, meet less often, to see if that will make him want to make an extra effort. He could be taking his pleasure for granted and feel he can have sex with you whenever he wants to without really having to perform every time. Unfortunately, there are many selfish lovers out there like your b/f and if he hasn't shown any signs of having the will to change after having been aware of the problem, then he probably never will.

    Comment

    • jns
      Assistant Admin
      • Mar 2010
      • 8398

      I agree with stressed. Is your bf good with his hands and oral in giving you pleasure? Or do you only orgasm during intercourse? Does he enjoy giving you pleasure? Can you rearrange it so he makes sure you have pleasure first before he gets his?
      I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
      ...
      Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

      From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

      Comment

      • Texasred
        Veteran Member
        • Oct 2009
        • 1216

        Originally posted by amino_vera
        i feel like whenever my bf and i have sex, its always about him. once hes done, its over. he just goes to sleep. its not like once im done i just stop and go to sleep, obviously i would continue until he's finished too. i've tried telling him before how i felt but its hard to explain. it seems like he doesn't even want to try to make me orgasm. i feel frustrated and hurt and like he's being really selfish. all he cares about is his own needs. shouldn't he want to make me feel good as well? i feel like if a guy truly cares about you he would focus on your needs too. i've tried telling him how i feel, but i don't think he gets it. it just feels like im asking him to make me orgasm, like im forcing him to do it, and he doesn't want to do it himself simply for the fact of pleasing me. there have been so many times where i've solely focused on him but he has never done the same for me. i just need some help in telling him how i feel because i don't exactly know how to word it without feeling like im asking or forcing him to want to please me
        One way of letting him know how you feel would be to let him read what you wrote here.
        If he has any interest in your feelings at all, he'll get the message. If he gets mad and stomps out, you haven't really lost anything.

        Comment

        • kattt
          Junior Member
          • Dec 2012
          • 1

          hi i know this post isnt recent.... but i am in the EXACT same situation :/ can you tell me if anything ever worked out??? please

          Comment

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