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  • vubb89
    Junior Member
    • Aug 2011
    • 1

    never had an orgasm!!! Please help!!!!

    I am 22 years old, and I have been having sex for the past 4 years with multiple different partners, however I have NEVER experienced an orgasm. Ive had sex with boyfriends as well as random partners but nothing has seemed to work. I also masturbate quite alot, and I have tried SEVERAL different toys! It just seems like I cannot get to that point of cumming! I quite enjoy oral sex but sometimes when a guy goes down on me it feels really good and I get sorta a buildup but then my clit gets really sensitive and I just quit... am i supposed to push past this senstivity and just keep going? It sucks because Ive always had to fake an orgasm because I feel self conscious in telling my boyfriend that I cannot orgasm. I try to relax during sex and not think about it, but it still doesnt work! I dont know if there is something wrong with me? If i am masturbating, I usually masturbate to porn and I usually experience a sort of build up but then my clit gets really sensitive and I cant keep going. Although, as soon as that happens I feel alot of liquid come out of my vagina and i feel a little contraction down there but I dont think this is an orgasm because I didnt get the WOW feeling. Everyone says you will be able to know FOR SURE when you orgasm, I always thought that this could be just it but theres gotta be more to it? Is there?? someone PLEASE HELP!!!!
  • LanaBear
    Veteran Member
    • Jul 2009
    • 8373

    Having an orgasm and cumming are not synonymous in women. We can do one without the other.

    Originally posted by vubb89
    If i am masturbating, I usually masturbate to porn and I usually experience a sort of build up but then my clit gets really sensitive and I cant keep going. Although, as soon as that happens I feel alot of liquid come out of my vagina and i feel a little contraction down there but I dont think this is an orgasm because I didnt get the WOW feeling.
    Everyone's orgasm's are different. Based on this, it sounds like you are on your way there, but not allowing yourself to get there fully.

    You can't over analyze an orgasm. It sounds like you are putting too much weight on yourself to have one.

    Originally posted by vubb89
    It sucks because Ive always had to fake an orgasm because I feel self conscious in telling my boyfriend that I cannot orgasm.
    And this... Will get you no where. If you cannot have open and honest communication regarding sex, especially orgasms, it will not benefit either of you. With that said, you need to be able to figure out what pleases you FIRST, before you can let yourself get to that point with a partner, IMO. However, if he KNOWS you cannot or have not been able to have an orgasm, he may be more than willing to work with you and help you get to that point.

    Comment

    • cherry2
      Member
      • Aug 2011
      • 10

      I think I understand what you are experiencing. When I was first with my boyfriend he would give me oral and it would feel so amazing. I was confused since it felt so much better than masturbating that I was orgasming when it started to build rapidly. But when it became really sensitive and felt like I had to pee I backed off.

      One time I kind of lost track and it got that point but then suddenly I orgasmed. I realized immediately that I had in fact never orgasmed with him I had just been confused.

      For me I would definitely say that there is a point before an orgasm where I hurt almost. All I can say is if you have never gone past that sensitive point, you may want to try.

      Comment

      • Elanor-Jane
        Veteran Member
        • Aug 2011
        • 211

        Try and push past the sensitivity and relax. This used to happen to me all the time. When your with yourself and it gets sensitive move your fingers a little way off ur clit but keep the stimulation going maybe slow it down a little when u feel like your getting that intense sensitivity. I would move the stimulation more onto the hood of my clit and give it a little breather so to speak. Then when it's calmed a little go back in but keep it broad over the whole area and think of the dirtiest horniest thing u can think of! Good luck everyones different but this worked for me back in the day xxx
        If I knew where I was going I would already be there
        I wish I had more time. Judicious, beautiful, augmented, whatever.
        I've always been afraid to die, but I think I'm more afraid to live. (BC, SP)

        "I would go out tonight, but i havent got a stitch to wear!" Morissey

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