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my boyfriends lack of confidence
I have been with this wonderful man for about two years now and ever since we started dating he always had issues with his size. He's not very long but he sure is wide. In my book its perfect but he dosent seem to listen to me. When we have sex I'm always FULLY satisfied and I know he is too but always comment on his size saying that he wishes he had more to give me, he's not big enough blah blah blah . He dosent seem to understand how wrong he is because his ex is a real see you next Tuesday and told him he was too small all the time. Any suggestions ? -
You tell someone something over and over and over, their sub-conscious will believe it..
She did, you do it.
But, in addition if a man feels like a man, wow, never before, I love him, love looking at him, your man will forget the past mind game and see this one, ...it's called time.PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL! -
If you kiss him and/or hug him and tell him how satisfying the sex was after every session, his ego will mostly convince him that he really is satisfying over time. And it will all be true. Don't argue, just state what you feel. The continued affirmations over time tied in with an emotional response is the key. Never forget to say it even if the latest session wasn't as good as it may undo all of the previous efforts. Things will go back to being good. If they don't, work on getting them good again. He probably felt inadequate before his ex, but she really damaged him with her comments.I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
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Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?
From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, VirginiaComment
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Tell him how beautiful he is all the time, when he says how much bigger he wishes he was, pat his penis and tell him how much you love it, maybe describe in detail how he satisfied you and how good you feel afterwards. It's all true anyway! It sounds like his last girlfriend talked him down so much he fully believed her, now you just have to reverse it by talking him up!Comment
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I don't know how comfortable your partner feels about you talking about your past experiences, but I find men listen the most when being compared to other men - negatively or positively. If you tell him stories about how the guy with the biggest penis satisfied you the least because its not about the size of the boat but the motion of the ocean. Only do this if you feel sure he will be OK with you talkinga about your past experiences.
The other thing is give him an anatomy lession. The inside of the vagina is not that particularly sensitive, except for may be G-spot, but that's not even the case for every woman. The most nerve endings are around the clit. If you look at the anatomy of the clit, its not just that nub you see at the top of the vulva but it extends down the side of the vulva, something like a wishbone. It doesn't extend into the vagina. Being longer is not going to do anything for you. About the width, remind him that a woman accommodate to whatever size. Just image if she didn't, especially if she can push a baby out of there, the man would have to be pretty massive to satisfy a women who has had kids
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose - Kris Kristofferson and Fred Foster (sung by Janis Joplin)Comment
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Tell him that you enjoy his penis in every detail. The next time he brings up his size in a negative way, tell him that there's nothing unattractive about his penis, but there is something unattractive about his talking about it in a negqtive way.
There's also a chance that he has a humiliation fetish, and he doesn't know how to ask you to play with him about it. It can be touchy to ask him this, but if you do, and you're sure his ego can take it without bruising, you might both have some fun with it. Right now, it definitely isn't your thing, so your indulgin it opens the door to asking him to indulge one of your fantasies or fetishes.
This idea that he may secretly want you to play with him and tease him about his penis size will likely strike you as odd, but it reminds me very much of myself and some of my sexual interactions before I even realized that I had this fetish. It was years before I understood it and asked a woman to indulge it. I wished I had understood and acted sooner. It is very common among men, especially with women they love and trust. Most guys who are into this are actually average of above in size.Comment
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