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  • Startinover3
    Junior Member
    • Aug 2012
    • 2

    New partner

    A question for other women.....This is my first time posting on a website like this, but I could really use some advice. I have been with the same guy for 15 years and now getting a divorce. I have moved on and have been with another guy. We have been together a couple of times now and after each time, I find that I am bleeding a little bit after sex. I'm not sure why, but I am thinking maybe because my new partner is so much bigger than what I have been used to? I don't know. I'm not in any pain during or after. Any ideas?
  • jns
    Assistant Admin
    • Mar 2010
    • 8398

    Are you using enough lube? Maybe you need to use more with your new partner.
    I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
    ...
    Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

    From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

    Comment

    • Claret
      Assistant Admin
      • Jan 2011
      • 1823

      You may not like this answer but here goes. As we (dare I say it) age, the structure of the vagina can atrophy somewhat. Normally if hormones are all in order, with lubrication, intercourse shouldn't be a problem. If there is any type of hormonal imbalance, then excessive dryness can lead to fissures and cracks which can bleed.

      Also, going out on a limb here, I'm thinking that you went a period of time without sex. The old adage, use it or lose it, is true. If this is the case, things should straighten out soon.

      If the problem persists, contact your doctor, see if he'll prescribe a plant-based hormone cream which will serve to thicken the vaginal walls and provide additional natural moisture. And, as always, use a good lubricant.
      That which we forget may as well never really happened.

      Comment

      • Startinover3
        Junior Member
        • Aug 2012
        • 2

        Yes, there was a long period of time where I wasn't sexually active. I'm only on my late 30's, I hope my body is not changing that much yet?
        :-( I will try some lube next time. Any suggestions on good lube? Thank you!

        Comment

        • Guest

          Water based lubes tend to "dry out" and need regular re-application in order to provide the result that many desire. Clean up is easy and there isn't any concern about 'foreign' materials entering your body.

          Silicone based lubes are much more 'slippery' (lubricating) and a little bit goes a looooooong way. Some poeple don't like the idea of silicone being inside their body and clean up can take a bit more effort than the water based lubes.

          I am neither an expert on lubes or have any science to back up the concerns I've heard about silicone.

          I'll leave the science up to our 'resident expert' and top notch research scientist ItsASecret...and leave the concerns about your body and what you put into it, up to you.

          Your body is a temple...treat it accordingly!

          Comment

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