[decoyalone]

I'm actually very embarrassed to ask about this, but it's anonymously on a forum, so here it goes...

When I rub my clitoris during masturbation I can never really feel like it's being stimulated enough. It isn't that I'm not aroused enough, since I can get aroused to the point where I can get myself to "squirt" a fair amount, which does provide just a little bit of ease on the tension. I get to the point where my skin feels very hot and prickly and my breathing picks up, but then nothing happens after that and my fingers there just don't feel particularly "great". I stimulate it as directly as possible as well (it's always completely covered by the hood), and probably in a way that would get to be just too much stimulation for some people. I have a very high sex drive, so it all just builds and builds and I have never been able to get a release from that through an orgasm. I've gotten to the point where my muscles twitched just a bit, but it didn't go beyond that and I know it wasn't an orgasm.

Help?

[DSemcho]

You might not be able to orgasm from clitoral stimulation. Have you tried hitting your gspot or using a toy? I know when I try to hit my own gspot I can't do it - but clitoral or a combination of a vibrator (not moving in and out just sitting pointed toward my gspot) and clitoral stimulation actually get me off well.

[JonDoe]

Make sure to use plenty of lube because a dry finger on a dry clitoris isn't going to feel good for too long. Rubbing just to the left and/or right side of the clitoris can also be very pleasurable. After you are really turned on, gently pulling back the hood and rubbing directly on the clitoris should be very pleasurable. Adjust the pressure, pattern and tempo of rubbing until you find what really works for you. Above all else, focus on breathing and relaxation. If you tense your muscles and breathe too shallow or hold your breath you may have difficulty achieving an orgasm or the orgasm may not be as intense. Once you have mastered these tips, and are having orgasms, then you include thoughts of fantasies too.

Hope this helps. Good luck practicing and enjoy!

[JS25]

I have a question to ask you ladies??
I’m 39 and have been with the same partner for 17 years. We have great sex, he always make me orgasm, in fact he always like to make sure I have 2 or 3. I’ve never had issues until recently. For the past 7 weeks we have taken our sexual life to new heights. We have introduced swing sex, wand usage and we have been like nympomaniacs.
but recently I can’t orgasm with normal stimulation like with his fingers or tongue. It just feels numb and I end up using the wand or a high jet shower. I’ve always liked a shower orgasm.
but I’m getting really emotional and upset that my husband isn’t able to give me that intimate orgasm anymore. We still have great sex, I in fact have become the dominator in the bedroom. And I’m wanting it all day every day and even waking him up during the night to have sex.
I use a dildo to orgasm too.
I feel really numb down there and it looks like it’s gone smaller.
Am I worrying too much or is this a sign of clitorous atrophy or could it be the start of the menopause. I feel abnormal for wanting all this sex all of a sudden, and my husband is more than happy to assist but it’s just making me really upset because I really miss the way we used to have sex.
I hope someone else has felt this way before or can explain more to me. I feel like going to the doctors.

[EmptyNester]

I have a question to ask you ladies??
I can’t orgasm with normal stimulation like with his fingers or tongue. It just feels numb and I end up using the wand or a high jet shower. I’ve always liked a shower orgasm.

It might be time to take some time away from all the toys and the high power shower. Give it a couple of weeks of only normal stimulation to see if the sensation comes back. Might be a bit sexually frustrating for a bit, but also will make you even hornier for your husband.

[JS25]

It might be time to take some time away from all the toys and the high power shower. Give it a couple of weeks of only normal stimulation to see if the sensation comes back. Might be a bit sexually frustrating for a bit, but also will make you even hornier for your husband.

We are trying this. I’ve not used the wand for 5 days now. But no feeling is coming back. I’ve researched it and it says after a couple of days break it should return. But it isn’t.
It’s really upsetting me and making me emotional xx

[EmptyNester]

We are trying this. I’ve not used the wand for 5 days now. But no feeling is coming back. I’ve researched it and it says after a couple of days break it should return. But it isn’t.
It’s really upsetting me and making me emotional xx

What about the shower and dildo? Any vibrating mechanism should be removed in favor of normal stimulation. Give it time and just relax and try not to pressure your self. Pressure will only make it worse.