[Kmorri]

I'm afraid that I may have a problem with sex. I am constantly wanting to have sex with my fiancé and lately he's been saying that I need to calm down. Then when he says that he's too tired (he works 70 hours every week) I feel like depressed and can't get sex off of my mind. I masterbate about 3 times at least daily and I am still not completely satisfied. I don't know what to do to calm my nerves. Advice please??

[Harmony]

Out of idle curiosity, how old are you, late twenties/early thirties?

This is normal. If I was/when I was working those hours sex once or twice a week was fine for me. When I'm on holiday in the sun or just sleeping well and feeling free of stress then I'm up for sex three times a day too.

Just remember that it's not anything you've done wrong, or that he wants sex with anyone else, being tired and stressed kills the male sex drive pretty quick.

Do you work 70 hour weeks too? If you want to do something for him then run him a bath after work and give him a blow-job after, it may lead to sex, it may not, but I'm sure he'll appreciate it.

[Guest]

hi Kmorri

you are absolutely normal

in my case both of us are working for long hours me > 72 hours and she > 60 hours a week,

yesterday night she said no coz she was tired but it was saturday night and i just told her no sex only just cuddling, caressing and .....

guess what it went on for a while and ended up with lot of fire works

If you want to do something for him then run him a bath after work and give him a blow-job after, it may lead to sex, it may not, but I'm sure he'll appreciate it.

good way to initiate

but don't feel bad

[EagerToLearn]

My girlfriend and I had this same problem. Have either of y'all changed physically since you started dating? Weight gain, nutrition, etc.? Does his job require a lot of effort like hard labor?

Before even answering these, I suggest that you two treat yourself to a nice calm evening or night. A nice quiet date at home. No fancy restaurants, no watches, no clocks, no phones, no pressure. You both can get dressed fancy if you want. The two of you need to enjoy each other's company. After the mood is calm and soothing, start slowly to "sexual movements and acts". Sometimes stress is mainly mental.
It might even be as simple as taking an interest in something he likes. For example, if he likes college basketball. Talk to him about March Madness and look up some stuff about it. When my girlfriend talked to me about super heroes, the stress gradually went away.

[Kmorri]

No neither of us have gained weight or anything. His work is a lot of hard labor an I know it's rough on him. Just sometimes I feel like he doesn't feel sexually attracted to me for some reason, then other times I think I'm just being crazy.

[Kmorri]

No I stay at home and take cre of our daughter so I don't work at all. An yes I'm in my early twenties. But I have done some similar stuff to that and I think it does help a little. I know I shouldn't freak out about something so little. I know he's just stressed

[BabyGirl]

Hi,
Slightly confused here. You posted a thread yesterday about possible Menopause at age 18 .

Possible metapause at 18??
So I usually get my periods on time and have never really had any trouble. This is the second month I've missed it an lately I've been having extreme hot flashes, mood swings, and major headaches. Some abdominal cramps and nausea. Since I am sexually active my fort thought was pregnancy, test came back negative and some of the symptoms you just don't get with pregnancy. Can any one provide me with some advice? I'm seriously worried

And here in this thread you say you are in your early 20's ? Which are you ?

I bring this up because many women have changes in their periods from 18 - 24, your body,usually by 24 has set itself to a fairly normal cycle. But during those few years , you can miss , have heavier, longer, shorter and lighter periods .

Now to this issue, Fiance works 70 hours. He may be very tired and as others have said, he needs some relaxation. Remember sex is a Physical workout.
Also you mention having a daughter. Is she his and yours ? This may be important in the fact that,in your other post ( about menopause) you mentioned you are sexually active and you took a Pregnancy test and it was negative. You did not mention any Birth Control, Condoms or pills.

This could be weighing on his mind . If you are not using protection from Pregnancy . He may just not want to risk another child or even if your daughter is not his, any child right now. That can definitely be a " Mood Inhibitor ".

Him saying you need to calm down about the sex, may be him saying " I don't want to risk getting you Pregnant ". He may think you are trying to get pregnant again and he's not ready for a child. So being Tired is an " Easy Out ".

You should go see a Dr. get on some form of birth control, this will help steady your periods, balance your hormones, it may take a month or two. It will also make him feel " safer " from his accidentally getting you pregnant.
Knowing you are protected from Pregnancy, may help in his desire to have sex with you more often. After he rests from a hard day at work, of Course .

[Kmorri]

I said early 20's cuz ill be 19 in like a week, and it's easier to say I'm in my early 20's rather than explaining why I'm engaged so young. An no, she is his daughter but the mother is not in her life so she considers me her mother. And it's not the fact that he's worried about pregnancy, considering we are trying to get pregnant. Another component to my menopause theory for the fact that I'm not exactly fertile especially for my age.

[family1st]

I'm afraid that I may have a problem with sex. I am constantly wanting to have sex with my fiancé and lately he's been saying that I need to calm down. Then when he says that he's too tired (he works 70 hours every week) I feel like depressed and can't get sex off of my mind. I masterbate about 3 times at least daily and I am still not completely satisfied. I don't know what to do to calm my nerves. Advice please??

It will not last all the time probably, you will wax and wane throughout life. But remember this: NOW YOU KNOW HOW MOST GUYS FEEL.... and have a little compassion on your husband when your married 5 years with 2 kids.