[vvv]

Ok so this guy I have liked and been talking to for a while now have tried to have sex 3 times..and all were, unsuccessful. I met him at work, had a huge crush on him, and thought he and i would be perfect together. i assumed the first time if we ever have sex, it would be great! the first night we hooked up (back in November/December) we didn't finish. It was alright..but we did not finish. He couldn't. He blamed it on the drug he took that night. The next time we hooked up, (on New Years) I was too tired to even have sex. i was exhausted from my job and not in good physical shape .. So, i "knew" it had to have been me. But, the other night.. yes i was not feeling 100% (really drunk/starving/tired) , but i think it was more him than me. We attempted at having sex again and it didn't work. He seemed aroused my my oral, and he gave great oral.. but he took forever to come..and i was running low on fuel so i just gave up. He asked why i stoped, i thought it wasn't going anywhere i told him.. he said "what! i was feeling good! you shouldn't have stoped.. i just take long to come". So we tried again..and this time he took forever even to get hard! I called it quits.

Sorry but i was getting tired and bored of it. And yes he gives great oral..but i didn't wanna come myself that way.. id rather us together through intercourse. I feel.. he doesn't initiate well while having sex. like i have to do all the work. this i am not use to, and don't like.
This guy seems to really like me, and not just for hooking up, i mean LIKE like.. after new years i actually was thinking he may like me more seriously than i like him..

So my questions here or this: Does this really mean i don't like him as much as i thought i would?( cus i would think if you like a guy- you want to and enjoy having sex with him!)
Does it mean we just..don't have that chemistry?
Could this potentially work out..? Obviously. If the sex is not great - i don't want this guy for a friends with benefits type a deal. I would want him for seriousness(dating) because he'd be perfect for that. But- how can we have a relationship where the sex is not great!?

If hes a guy who jjust takes forever to come.. How can i help that? Was i wrong to quit? Or is it just bad on his part for not putting in more work ..- like not even getting on top for once?!

I need some suggestions/advice please and thanks

[Claret]

I think you both should try having sex when you both are stone cold sober. Then come back here and let us know how that went.

[tartar sauceee]

If u like him enough u will wait

If u dont... U wont wait

The bigger question is.... How much do u like him?

We all break rules for the ones we really really like

[BabyGirl]

He blamed it on the drug he took that night.

yes i was not feeling 100% (really drunk/starving/tired

Claret hit the nail on the head.

Have you tried being Sober and Drug Free ( both of you ) ?

i actually was thinking he may like me more seriously than i like him..

and then the

i don't want this guy for a friends with benefits type a deal. I would want him for seriousness(dating) because he'd be perfect for that.

Kinda counteract each other.

You think he may be into you more than you are him ?
But he would be perfect for Serious Dating/ Relationship if the sex was Better ?

You don't mention any Qualities he has,like he's funny, attentive, caring, responsible.
Right now he's a Friend without all the " Benefits".

If you are searching for someone Special that could possibly turn into " Mr. Right ". And he may possibly be the " One".

Try dating him , actual dates, with no sex expected and no sex Given or Taken. Sober and Drug Free Dates.
Get to know him, the Drug and Alcohol Free Him. Try being Alcohol and Drug free ( if you use ) also, be well rested and fed ( or an Dinner & Movie Date).

It's pretty hard to say

thought he and i would be perfect together

if you haven't any real foundation together, other than you have a Crush on him and he likes you and the times you do try to have Sex, he can't perform and you give up, due to both of you being Under the Influence of Alcohol and or Drugs.

I don't know your ages, but I would say fairly young, early twenties at most. I say this due to more mature people have outgrown ( most ) the Drinking and Drugging Sex and Dating scene and are actually looking to find someone compatible with the same goals in life. And they are choosy of whom they decide to have Sex with and sex ( Usually ) comes after knowing they are compatible in other ways First.

[vvv]

thanks All!