[Brad90]

So it's been about seven weeks since I lost my virginity. My girl and I are having sex three or four times a week (basically as often as we can manage given our schedules). Usually I'm still not able to last as long as I would like and feel that I'm short-changing her, especially on the occasions when she doesn't get to orgasm during intercourse (although I will give her one afterwards on those occasions).

Basically, I am still finding the sensations of being in her vagina pretty overwhelming. I was wondering if there is any sort of time table for knowing when I will become more used to it and more able to control myself. Any thoughts, or ideas about how to get better control? Thanks!

[Lcturner3]

I'm not sure there's a time. Although I'm not a male, during intercourse my boyfriend will think of other things so he will last longer. Like work or a tv show or something. He's told me that several times. Certain positions help too. We save his favorite ones for last that way he doesn't orgasm as quick. I think it's just something you have to experiment with. Don't worry about it so much!

[shoshannah]

It's sweet that you're concerned for your girlfriend. But don't be too hard on yourself about not having good control yet--remember that her vagina is designed to make you lose control, otherwise there would never be any babies. :-) Seven weeks isn't really a long time. My fiance took several months before he had pretty good control, and even today he sometimes has trouble, depending on our position, how long it's been since we last had sex, and such, and we've been having sex for nearly three years.

Like Lcturner, my fiance sometimes thinks of other things to slow himself down. sometimes if I'm moving my hips too much he tells me to stop moving, and he stops as well. Now and then he'll pull out if he's getting too close and wants to last longer. another thing he does is to try to relax his penis and muscles down there completely instead of keeping them tense. Are you using condoms? We generally don't, but the few times we've had to, my fiance has found that they slow him down a lot, although we do lose some intimacy and pleasure by using them (which is why we normally don't).

I think over time you will naturally learn to hold back, and you and your girlfriend will also learn some ways to slow you down. Meanwhile, if you do come before you're ready, don't get upset or let it ruin the mood. I think that's the most important thing. Even when my fiance comes before I'm ready, it's still very intimate and bonding--I get off on knowing that I have given him so much pleasure and that he finds me so hot that he can't help himself. :-) Just relax and enjoy it and know that there will be another time very soon.

I hope this helps!

[LisaW1991]

Even experience guys can have difficulty holding back, and pretty much every guy I have had sex with has his first orgasm as he is entering me or shortly there after. It really doesn't bother me because I do enjoy the feeling when his cumming inside me. My vagina tend to contract when I start having sex, and it causes most guys to have an orgasm when they feel it contracting on their erection.

Some tricks girls will do is give the guy a HJ in advance because it will take him longer to reach orgasm the second time. I don't do that very often, I just let them have their first orgasm quick, because the second time does take them longer.

[a_dub]

I've always wondered the same question.

Does the guy's age matter more or his level of experience in terms of him gaining ejaculatory control???

[rcoreyus]

Both matter, but age makes a huge difference - often the problem reverses so that a man can't orgasm just from intercourse .