[Lost desire]

OK I had a robotic hist. Healing fine but when I have sex half way through I have to quit. My husband gets upset at me and I feel for him. But I just don't know what to do he does every thing to try to get me in the mood after 15 min I lose all desire and quit on him. What can I do?

[Guest]

I have not experienced a robotic hysterectomy before but I did have a tube removed. I think any surgery where a part of your reproductive system is removed will have psychological effects. This will take time to get over. It's similar to going through a bereavement.

You are still the same woman before the surgery. You are still attractive to your husband. Talk to your husband and let him know what's on your mind. Maybe there is too much pressure on making love right now. Explore other ways of being intimate. Plan date evenings or time during the day.

I would suggest doing at least one thing that you enjoy every day. Pamper yourself, it doesn't have to cost a lot of money, watching a dvd that interests you, having a long soak in the bath with oils or a luxury bubble bath, ask your husband to give you a full body massage.

Try to relax.

Journalling also helps to express your emotions. Write down what is on your mind, even if it is negative. This will help you to see what's wrong and help you to find solutions.

I hope this helps.

Serenity Kit

[Lost desire]

Thanks I'll give it a try, the body massage too.