[jslater]

So sorry to hear about your struggles...The problem you are having is actually pretty common is so many struggling relationships. It really boils down that breakdown n communication and the shifting of power. My intuition tells me that he sees himself as the family provider while you don't work so your job is to take care of his needs. From his perspective your job is to blow him and swallow. It's the least you can do. The problem for you... doing anything out of guilt or to simply shut him up is the wrong reason to do it. For most...swallowing is really about intimacy. By moving away from what you knew... Leaving the Independence you had when you worked. Your are at a disadvantage and unfortunately he is using that against you. I'm so sorry to hear that. My brother did exactly the same thing to his wife that your husband is doing to you and it's wrong on so many levels. If it has escalated to the point your saying...I doubt he is going to listen any further to see your point. The reality is your marriage is ceasing to be a marriage and the longer this goes the worse it will get. Reading your words I can feel you losing your sense of self. My best advice like some said is to get a job no matter what it is and start saving. He knows he controls the situation because you have few options. You can't just leave. The key to saving your marriage is for him to know there is a real consequence to him treating you this way. I told my sister in law the same thing. Thank goodness she took the advice. Once she had saved up enough after working at a boutique store she finally told my brother she had enough. Once she told him she was leaving. He said go ahead. So she left. With a month he was calling her to forgive him. Smartly she didn't initially. She made him wait almost a year... Making him realize all the damage he did, earning back the trust. bottom line... he doesn't seem to respect you and you have to find a way to regain some of that respect and control even if it means you leave.

[Poupée]

Thank you everyone for your time and advices. I took a little from all of you and came out with a solution. After 3 days not talking to each other, I went to him and asked/forced him to listen to me. I told him absolutely everything I liked, disliked and feared. I told him what I am willing to do and not and what I am also capable of doing, making sure he understands that he doesnt owe me, we both in this realtionship because we want to. I told him my mistakes, what I had understood and misunderstood, expected and not expected from our situation. So since we are at this point, we have to deal with it for the best of our marriage. I told him that I would try to swallow because I want to please him not because I am forced. But if I tried and cant, he should understand and help me help him...

I created a calendar of activities to do together and I will start a business. After listening to me and I think for the very first time he really listened, he hugged me and apologized for how he made me feel. He even told me that ejaculating in my mouth was never important, he is happy with our sexual life and just the fact that I want to try means the world to him. I smiled and didnt comment on the "ejaculating in your mouth is not important" but deep down I was thinking to myself "and we had such a big fight about it?" :-)

I am happy we solved our issue and thank you so much all of you for your support!

[rcoreyus]

Good news! Maybe you can even give him a special treat for his birthday if everyone is happy.

[Mr. Neo]

So since we are at this point, we have to deal with it for the best of our marriage. I told him that I would try to swallow because I want to please him not because I am forced. But if I tried and cant, he should understand and help me help him...

It would be nice to know if you made any progress. I wish my wife had the same point of view as yours. I hope she will change some day.

[Poupée]

I didnt make any progress on swallowing per say. But we found a way to help me swallow, i give him a bj with a piece of chocolate in my mouth. I make sure i always have the chocolate taste in my mouth so when he comes, its easier for me to swallow ツ

Suggest that to ur wife, she might find it enjoyable.

[Mr. Neo]

Thanks for the tip Poupée. I'll suggest it to my wife.