[Eleyni]

Hey everyone!

I'd just like to thank you all in advance for taking some time to help me figure out what's going on.

So, I've been going out with this guy for 2 months and a half, and we've known each other for a over a year now. We are truly and madly in love.
Lately, and I'm talking about the last two attempts, when we started intercourse, he ejaculated without even realising and didn't have an orgasm. This was about after one minute of penetration and a decent amount of foreplay before.

Now, I'm wondering, what's happening to him? Is this normal?
Initially, he suffered from SPA (sexual performance anxiety), but he got over it and had managed to have sex a few times before I got my period and had to lay off. Now we're trying again, but this is happening instead. Can anyone tell me if this is serious? Is there anything I can do for him?

Thank you all so much

[effy2014]

Let me answer the last question first. Be loving and non-judgmental. Conceal any disappointment from him and communicate your support and that you will do anything to help.

As for the sexual issue, he may not have truly gotten over his SPA or may have a medical issue. There are specialized clinics that deal with sexual disfunctions and there are lots of good medications. Make it safe for him to go get checked out and seek help -- whether it is medical or mental.

[jns]

Have you tried for a second round for him? Usually the second round is slower for a guy. Maybe laying off of the foreplay on him will make it so he isn't so excited when he starts intercourse. Condoms usually reduce sensation. If you are not using them, you could try using them to lower the amount of sensation he gets. Also, work on getting him to relax. Possibly that is the common thread between the SPA and the premature ejaculation.

[Trixareforkids]

he ejaculated without even realising and didn't have an orgasm. This was about after one minute of penetration and a decent amount of foreplay before.

This raises a few questions for me.
If he didn't feel it, how do you know he ejaculated? Was there ejaculate fluids or are you assuming he ejaculated because he lost his erection during intercourse? The reason I ask is because one points to a physical issue and the other could be either physical or mental.
Is he having any problems when he goes solo? If he's all good, can maintain an erection and reach orgasm solo then it's most likely not a physical issue.
Jns made some good suggestions and I would add that there are always toys to take the pressure off and ease his anxiety while allowing you both to get what you're after.

[kate61]

If you love him you need to accept him and lower any sexual expectations you may have. He may have a lot on his mind and maybe you may be dealing with your own issues unaware. I have been there and its not an easy road. Give it time. And don't point it out to him as it may hurt his ego. Go online and search for info on how to stay long in bed. And if you are going to try any suggestions be careful not to point them directly. You need to be verrry patient