[honeybee888]

What is the normal amount of sex for a relationship? I know different factors can contribute. Say under these circumstances of not living together, been dating over a year, in mid 20's and a healthy relationship otherwise. What would be the norm? What is most effective during the 'bored' phase if they guy is in it?

[Patti-here]

This is very hard to answer, how many times is a personal choice, if you're living together, it may be every day/night, or not.. I'm sorry but I don't think I can answer this.

[atskitty2]

Yes honeybee, we would need more info to help you. What is "normal" is only normal for that specific couple. We all have different needs
Are you or is your guy feeling bored, or are you sensing some changes in your sex life? Look around here, you will find some great info on reviving a flailing sex life.

You can be specific and detailed. It's anonymous here and a non-judging crowd. We love to help.

[honeybee888]

Well i have more sexual needs than him, which he has never told me no, but lately i have just let him initiate it and only get it about once a week at most.

[effy2014]

Why are you looking for normal? If you are thinking that he will negatively judge you because you have a high libido, the he is the wrong guy for you. Go after what you want -- which is a healthy sex life. If you want it more, then initiate when you feel like it.

Good communication skills are essential for a lasting relationship. Don't assume that he doesn't want sex more because he initiates it only once a week. He may be thinking that "normal" for a girl is once a week and he does not want you to judge him as a sex maniac. You could both be on the same page (and having way more sex) if you would talk about it.

Even if his current comfort level is once a week, that is good information for you to know. There are lots of ways that you might encourage him to give you want you want and to spice things up. Just read the topics in this forum.

[Motorguy]

Well i have more sexual needs than him, which he has never told me no, but lately i have just let him initiate it and only get it about once a week at most.

Well have you turn the table Honeybee on husband and kind of intiate sex in the bedroom instead. it sounds like you wanting sex more then the once a week. To me that's not enough for my self or my wife we average I would say 4 times a week maybe more depends on how are week has gone.

[jen1447]

I always wonder why people are so worried about abiding by a baseline when it comes to sex ....why would you want to have sex as much or little as your neighbors? And what qualifies as sex anyway?

To answer your questions, if it was me (single occupant, 20s, healthy, year long relationship), normal would be sex once a day with masturbation added in as necessary to take the edge off. Living apart, once a day sex might end up as twice a day on weekends and once three other days, etc. Masturbation becomes more of a need in that scenario, since there might be no-sex days (but usually even on sex days anyway). This also assumes one sex partner/BF, which is not my actual setup. So there you have it - perfectly normal!

[effy2014]

I always wonder why people are so worried about abiding by a baseline when it comes to sex ....why would you want to have sex as much or little as your neighbors? And what qualifies as sex anyway?

Well, Jen, if you were my neighbor, I might aspire to have as much sex as you have. Of course, it may kill me but I'd die happy.

To be serious for a moment, these young people are way too concerned about being labeled (****, prude, aggressive etc). Just be yourself. If you hide who you are to get man or woman, you will be writing here in 20 years asking why you've had to settle for a boring and infrequent sex life.

[Motorguy]

I always wonder why people are so worried about abiding by a baseline when it comes to sex ....why would you want to have sex as much or little as your neighbors? And what qualifies as sex anyway?

To answer your questions, if it was me (single occupant, 20s, healthy, year long relationship), normal would be sex once a day with masturbation added in as necessary to take the edge off. Living apart, once a day sex might end up as twice a day on weekends and once three other days, etc. Masturbation becomes more of a need in that scenario, since there might be no-sex days (but usually even on sex days anyway). This also assumes one sex partner/BF, which is not my actual setup. So there you have it - perfectly normal!

Now let me call my Philadelphia lawyer to explain it to me now Jenn just kidding. What happen with if you both are horny you have sex you both have a orgasm and then you cuddle for a bit or you go for round 2 lol.

[Euphoric]

There are some relationships where people love each other and settle for less in the sex department because their SO has so many other great qualities. If that works for them, then that's great. However, sexual inequality can be taxing on a relationship, especially over time.

I was recently engaged in a similar conversation when this question was asked. Honestly, I married my husband for companionship in all departments. If I were interested in a room mate rather than a partner, I'd have never married. That is not to say that there haven't been times when our drives were not in sync, or hampered due to health reasons. Of course, if you LOVE your spouse/partner then health becomes the priority, which leads to a closer bond and eventually lots of sex once health is restored.

It sure seems that I see many posts where the girl is scratching her head wondering where the heck her boyfriend's libido went. Role reversal??