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Yes actuall for me i have gone about a month with out looking at porn or some other girl online or offline. Granted i was dumped about a month ago for another guy but i dont think that hasd anything to do with it.the wolf hath howled,
the bloods been spilled.
life lingers in sleep,
dead to the world. -
Guest
most guys have to make a very deliberate effort to stay away from porn.
if your guy can't? we'd need to know more. but there are many guys hooked on porn. it's a mixture of habit (learned pattern of behavior) & chemical dependency (endorphin rush from the state of arousal) - and different guys experience different levels of those 2 things.
what makes you think he can't go without it?Comment
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This may cause contention and know that is not my intention but...if you are not yet married to him...Bail !
Can't go a day without porn?..what else if going to crop up and the relationship/marriage progresses. The man is a bit fruity....
Sure, we guys love porn, but if we have women to fulfill our own porn...what the hell do we need porn for other than a strait addiction.
And, if he’s addicted to porn, he has an addictive personality which means he can and will get addicted to alcohol, drugs, your parents medicine cabinet, the girl next door, etc, etc...
I stand firm on the suggestion to Bail while you can.
IF you are married, you need to lay down some ground rules and stand firm with them...I wish you the best of luck!Comment
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Why don't you let him know it upsets you? I mean, don't be all rude and mean about it [unless you absolutely have to], but you can try the whole "would you stop watching it? Do it for me". Or you can even be straight up about it. Ask him "Why are you always watching porn?" Then whatever he answers, let him know you're there for him [and to please him better than porn] and that you wish he didn't watch porn, at least not as often as he does. You see, he IS a guy, and he WILL watch porn, but try to suggest that it's okay to watch every once in a while, not as often as he does. It's like when someone wants to quit smoking, they can't just stop right then and there because it upsets somebody, but if they really love the person they're trying to "quit smoking" for, they're keep smoking, just not as much. Everyday it's a bit less, until eventually it's completely gone.. Just a thought..Comment
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I wouldn't tell him if you don't i'll give you this? I might as well be one of the Porn stars... If he can't stop and it's daily then i agree it's an addiction and they are hard to break.Why don't you let him know it upsets you? I mean, don't be all rude and mean about it [unless you absolutely have to], but you can try the whole "would you stop watching it? Do it for me". Or you can even be straight up about it. Ask him "Why are you always watching porn?" Then whatever he answers, let him know you're there for him [and to please him better than porn] and that you wish he didn't watch porn, at least not as often as he does. You see, he IS a guy, and he WILL watch porn, but try to suggest that it's okay to watch every once in a while, not as often as he does. It's like when someone wants to quit smoking, they can't just stop right then and there because it upsets somebody, but if they really love the person they're trying to "quit smoking" for, they're keep smoking, just not as much. Everyday it's a bit less, until eventually it's completely gone.. Just a thought..
I tried also to give up smoking and my other half said " do it for me" you can't you can only do it for yourself, no matter what the addiction is, or you fail.
Men are men, i agree, but not all watch Porn and some women do, or partners together, i'm sure we've all at least had a look.
Of course, it's important to say, i would prefer, as you are working towards harmony of two people, so there has to be a bit of give and take. I just think if a person said, do it for me and i'll give this, or do it for me, i would stop smoking, well, i'd do neither.
That's just my thoughts of course.PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!Comment
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It's an interesting thing. For me, I actually like to watch it more when the sex with my wife is really good. I guess you could say it provides fuel for the imagination. For example it's very easy to go to sites like youporn.com and find examples of kinky things married couples do to the passion alive.
Other times I'm just bored and need to get back to work.
The important thing to understand is that it's not monolithic. You need to understand what he's doing when he's looking at it. Sometimes it's just about wanting to know what other girls look like naked. Other times it's more complex. There are common patterns but in the end it's different for every guy.
And of course if he's looking at gay porn you may have a slightly bigger problem.Comment
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