[AngelaGielyn]

I'm having an intimacy issue here. I have been in marriage for 8 months so I can still say that I am a newlywed we've been together for 5 years almost 6 years and still don't have sex since we got married and last time my husband and I had sex was over 2 years ago and I'm not happy about it. We usually do it once or twice a month when we still in a bf/gf relationship . I am wondering why he's not asking for it now that we live in a same roof, we don't have kids and we have a lot of time to do it but he is just busy doing his work but it's 8 months for Pete's sake and we're NewlyWed!! And I don't know if he noticed it or what. He's working in his office for 6 days and 1 day in our house he is just so busy facing his laptop, touching his papers and his office desk and watch presentation given by his office mates. I don't even know if he's aware that he's in a marriage!. Next month he will celebrate his 32nd birthday and I want it to be special and unforgettable especially on his part so I'd decided to take our sex life into the next level. I also think that this might be the way to get out in this sexless marriage and to get back our romance. I searched for something that can spice up our intimacy time and luckily a friend of mine told me to look for this online store, adamandeve[dot]com and they're offering something that can make our sex life more exciting. I bought the Unleashed 4 and some of them are even 50% off and for free shipping and . My friend also told me to use LUST20 at the checkout to get the discount.I can't wait for it to arrive! Maybe after watching this he will love to be in our room with me rather than to be in his office with his laptop even ask me to go to a honeymoon trip. And I hope this will save me for being a total sexless wife.

Have any advice? please let me know, I really need it. I want to get the intimacy back in our relationship. Thank you in advance

[crazycatlady09]

Well, I feel almost the same way right now. Me and my boyfriend have been together over a year now and ever since our schedules have changed, we don't even have time to get it in! He gets up for work when I get home from work (430 am) and I get up and get ready for work when he fights atlanta traffic and gets home at about 7 right as I walk out the door! So when I have time, (maybe if you try this on his day off. ...) try getting in the shower, washing off first then calling him making him think you need something. And pull back the curtain winking and ask him to join for even just a "quickie".. or get out of the shower, while still wet put on some sexy lingerie, or even just sexy panties and no top! And lay spread out on the be (exc use me) and play with yourself a little then call him in while he walks in to see that! I'm a professional entertainer and this always works for me. ; ) pm me if you want more details or advice! Good luck!

[Motorguy]

Well Angela, all I can say is you want more sex. You need to take the bull by the horns so to speak and do something about it. I surprise you waited this long. So when you are in bed just flat tell him you need some closeness some intimacy just flat out sex. So scared him a little if he don't give you the sex you may need to find it someone where else. I really can't believe a guy at 32 is already dead in the sex life. Myself and wife are in are early 50's we do it when ever we can and that's probably why we had 4 kids. Till we solved that problem. But nothing going to change till you make it change or the routine will carry on day in and day out till 5 years comes around and then no sex at all. Well good luck I wish you all the best ciao.

[Lovcookie]

I would agree with Motorguy. If some changes are not made the marriage will not likely last.

[jns]

Angela and catlady, I think both of you got guys with very low sex drives. Once or twice a month while dating is very low unless you are in a long distance relationship and then if you are in a LDR, you try to make up for being apart every day while together.

Getting up at 4:30 to go to work while the other is just coming home is interesting. I would just get up earlier some of the time (to get ready) if the gf was interested in some nookie.

[LilahX]

I don't think you need to be thinking about 'spicing up' your sex life, you need to concentrate on just getting one back. Rather than wondering what toys might suddenly flip his switch back on I think you just need some quiet, honest and non-judgemental conversation. Don't accuse him, or blame him. Tell him you're worried about him, and about your r/ship. His reason for lack of sex drive is either going to be physical or emotional/psychological. You need to understand what it is and whether he is even interested in fixing it. Many men know there is a problem but feel less of a man if they admit it. It won't be easy but unless you know what you're dealing with you (both of you) won't know how to fix it. Good Luck!

[JonDoe]

The conversations may be difficult and emotional, but that pales in comparison to remaining in a sexless marriage or ending in divorce. Seek professional counseling if the situation does not improve. Trust me!!!

[LilahX]

I have to say that if you were only having sex once or twice a month it's not a shock that it's dwindled down to nothing now. I'm surprised you weren't worried pre-marriage that once or twice a month wasn't very often and that it didn't ring alarm bells that your partner (and perhaps you) appear to have exceedingly low sex drives. If his desire for you has never been great then I'm not sure you can realistically expect that to change. Irrespective, it's obviously something that's playing on your mind and it's not good for a r/ship to have something like this hanging between you. As mentioned by others, counselling would be essential whether to try and 'fix' the problem but definitely o bring discussion of feelings into the open - something that's a necessity for a r/ship to be healthy. Good luck!!

[JonDoe]

I'm having an intimacy issue here. I have been in marriage for 8 months so I can still say that I am a newlywed we've been together for 5 years almost 6 years and still don't have sex since we got married and last time my husband and I had sex was over 2 years ago and I'm not happy about it. We usually do it once or twice a month when we still in a bf/gf relationship . I am wondering why he's not asking for it now that we live in a same roof

Are you waiting for him to initiate? If so, why? Seduce him.

I recommend buying the book titled "The Sex Starved Marriage" by Michelle Weiner Davis. You should read it first and then ask him to read it for the sake of saving your marriage. Schedule time weekly to discuss the book and how it relates to your feelings, his feelings, and your marriage.

Another good source for some is the podcasts of "ONE Extraordinary Marriage". You can listen to it on the web or via a podcast app on your smartphone. Perhaps start with episode 140 - Scheduling Sex. oneextraordinarymarriage[dot]com/140-scheduling-sex