[1inlove]

My problem is i dont have much of a sex drive.I love sex but it takes my dh to start on me before i get turned on.Whenever we are in the process i am completely turned on and i enjoy it very much but what can i do to want it more? I am 31 years old shouldnt i have more of a drive?We always try to keep things different in the bedroom and we have a really good relationship(except for my sex prob) When we first started years ago i was always the aggressor....ALWAYS wanted it....what happened?

[miffed23]

Children? Stress?

Dont dwell on it too much hon, its positive that you "completely enjoy" intercourse when it gets going

Youre man might just have to work a little harder (so to speak) to get you in the mood before hand, as long as he isnt going to take offense, ask him if he could be more spontaneous with you (explaining why)...such as placing his hands in yours whilst youre doing the washing up, then turning you around and kissing you...touching you in public....getting into the shower whilst youre in there...

Things you could do yourself: buy some new saucy underwear (or even better, dont wear any) read a dirty book, i imagine there is some medication out there but thats a bit extreme as i dont think you need that....above all, relax....think dirty things all day, make everything an inuendo....driving back from work....."ooooo, mmmmm, the things i could do with this handbrake" "this leather feel soooo good against my naked skin"

[Nerd]

My problem is i dont have much of a sex drive.I love sex but it takes my dh to start on me before i get turned on.Whenever we are in the process i am completely turned on and i enjoy it very much but what can i do to want it more? I am 31 years old shouldnt i have more of a drive?We always try to keep things different in the bedroom and we have a really good relationship(except for my sex prob) When we first started years ago i was always the aggressor....ALWAYS wanted it....what happened?

Medications such as anti-depressants and birth control pills can affect sex drive, also.

[anonymouswhitefemale]

Apparently fish oil tablets help with sex drive. I'm not sure that "letting him to a bit more work" is a good option, as that's a way to build a divide in the relationship. Having been on the recieving end of a partner with next to zero sex drive, it is VERY frustrating and that breeds discontent in the rest of the relationship.

[miffed23]

I'm not sure that "letting him do a bit more work" is a good option, as that's a way to build a divide in the relationship.

This makes sense.... although, if he helps the process along prior to sex (which is the area in which she is struggling)...she can then 'do a bit more work' during sex...its all about give and take..

[The Orbess]

Watch porn.

As a matter of fact, there's a thread on here that might help-lol
just kidding, it's actually pretty gross...

By the way, that was a reference to the porn link thread that's been flagged and reported a dozen or so times!

Point being, try things that YOU alone enjoy. Be selfish every once in a while. If u can't bring yourself to watch porn by yourself, than watch it with him! I'm sure he won't object to it.

-Orbess

[anonymouswhitefemale]

Yeah, I just mean that if you're constantly trying to encourage someone to have sex, and they're semi receptive, after a while you just get sick of trying. Asking that someone to try more at that point is basically ridiculous. SHE needs to start initiating sex, if she never initiates he will quickly feel like she's just giving in to what he wants to do, instead of it being a mutually enjoyable act. Which means he will also stop initiating sex, then thre's no sex for a couple of weeks, tensions raise, etc etc.

[Nerd]

You may find this article helpful:
***Edited - Links not allowe*****

It's a good read and very well may make a difference if you are willing to give it a try. It's nothing horrible, just supplements and vitamins, etc.


~NerdGirl

[SinisterUrge]

When we first started years ago i was always the aggressor....ALWAYS wanted it....what happened?

Did your lack of libido happen to coincide with the release of World of Warcraft by any chance?

[Nerd]

Did your lack of libido happen to coincide with the release of World of Warcraft by any chance?

OMG! ROFL!

Unfortunately...I understand the question.