[Sugarsugar]

I could write an essay on what I’ve learned since experiencing the stress squirting has caused me in my relationship. But I’ll try to get to the point.
Never squirted til I had good sex in my late 30’s. Men I’ve been with have loved it but my current bf is not a fan. I was never self conscious til him- however I didn’t necessarily like the mess either.
People are quick to vilify men who don’t like squirting, but honestly I sort of understand. People have preferences. He has not tried to shame me for it but I know it sort of is a turn off for him at this point and feel it is now harming our sex life. He has “not been in the mood” a few times now. When the hell is a man ever “not in the mood” if he is “into” his woman?! Definitely doing a number on my self esteem even though I have never had insecurities in that area. I’m a pretty attractive lady ?.
I squirt every time during sex and A LOT. I have tried advice to empty bladder, try other positions, etc but it has not reduced the “gush” lol.
My gyno (and her colleagues she reached out to) offered little help. She basically said it’s normal for some women, a lot of women suffer from dryness so insinuated I should feel lucky, and had no advice. I am scheduled to see a urogynocologust now and hope they will have some kind of advice.
But- what I have read online, is pelvic floor therapy/exercises can help control it.
So my question to those who are “gushers” like me- and don’t like it-
Did you find any advice helpful?
OR specifically-did you do pelvic floor exercises and did they help? If you did, how long did you have to do them as a routine before you noticed they were “working” or helping the issue?
Did you do them on your own from internet help or did a therapist teach you?
It’s been really stressful because while some tell me maybe I picked the wrong man- as in we aren’t compatible- and I should find a man who loves the squirting- obviously it’s not that simple. I love the man I have and want to make it work with him. Honestly, I personally get annoyed with the mess too. So…. Help!

[Alison H.]

I really wish I had advice, at least from first-hand experience.

From what I've read, yes, pelvic floor therapy can help women who gush and don’t love it, especially when it’s frequent or hard to control. It’s not usually an instant fix, though. A therapist can assess what’s going on with your body and tailor things to you, at least (treatments, exercises, whatever they advise in that situation). And I think seeing a urogynecologist is a really smart next step. Even if the answer ends up being “this is just how your body works,” ruling out causes and getting guidance can be helpful, for sure.

I know you can find information online for techniques and pelvic floor exericises, but I do think seeing someone for that specifically is probably best, just so you're absolutely getting the right ones/best advice.

You’re right that people have preferences, and it sounds like he hasn’t shamed you. At the same time, it’s completely valid that this has hurt your confidence. Both things can exist at once. Wanting to work on it doesn’t mean you’re blaming yourself or “fixing” yourself for him, it means you care about the relationship but your own comfort, too.

If he's unsettled or turned off by the mess, having waterproof blankets or towels already in place (without making a big production out of it) might help. If cleanup feels simple and expected, it’s less likely to hang over the experience, if that's the issue. Some couples even keep wipes, towels, or a robe nearby so there’s no awkward scramble afterward.

(I keep hand towels and wipes in my nightstand drawer for general cleanup so they're super within reach and NBD.)

[JonnyR]

Sugarsugar This is a very common theme on our forum! I found a previous discussion that might give you some insight:

https://www.womens-health.com/boards/forum/sex-sexual-health/sex-sexuality/818197-squirting-is-ruining-my-sex-life

There's a lot of stuff said there that I won't repeat, including my own commentary on the final page of the thread, but suffiuce it to say, if it turns out that this can;t be reduced or stopped, then -- as I said there -- embrace, ennjoy and know that many guys love women who ejaculate because it simply reminds us of our own ejaculation and is an outward sign that you have had an orgasm and is one of the rare times (outside of a woman tellign a man when she's cumming, or lying) we can see we've shared our pleasure with a partner.

If there are ways to suppress or minimize it that are legit, studied and research or anecdotally-based, please come back and share with us here so others might also benefit, as I also do understand how taxing and tedious having to deal with this all the time can be.

[SRJ]

I could write an essay on what I’ve learned since experiencing the stress squirting has caused me in my relationship. But I’ll try to get to the point.
Never squirted til I had good sex in my late 30’s. Men I’ve been with have loved it but my current bf is not a fan. I was never self conscious til him- however I didn’t necessarily like the mess either.
People are quick to vilify men who don’t like squirting, but honestly I sort of understand. People have preferences. He has not tried to shame me for it but I know it sort of is a turn off for him at this point and feel it is now harming our sex life. He has “not been in the mood” a few times now. When the hell is a man ever “not in the mood” if he is “into” his woman?! Definitely doing a number on my self esteem even though I have never had insecurities in that area. I’m a pretty attractive lady ?.
I squirt every time during sex and A LOT. I have tried advice to empty bladder, try other positions, etc but it has not reduced the “gush” lol.
My gyno (and her colleagues she reached out to) offered little help. She basically said it’s normal for some women, a lot of women suffer from dryness so insinuated I should feel lucky, and had no advice. I am scheduled to see a urogynocologust now and hope they will have some kind of advice.
But- what I have read online, is pelvic floor therapy/exercises can help control it.
So my question to those who are “gushers” like me- and don’t like it-
Did you find any advice helpful?
OR specifically-did you do pelvic floor exercises and did they help? If you did, how long did you have to do them as a routine before you noticed they were “working” or helping the issue?
Did you do them on your own from internet help or did a therapist teach you?
It’s been really stressful because while some tell me maybe I picked the wrong man- as in we aren’t compatible- and I should find a man who loves the squirting- obviously it’s not that simple. I love the man I have and want to make it work with him. Honestly, I personally get annoyed with the mess too. So…. Help!

Unfortunately I can't cause my wife to squirt and only a few have and I was lucky enough to be under her when one man made her squirt.. I love it but a little humiliating when she lets u know how good he is. In front of him

[Alison H.]

I can understand it feeling a little humiliating, but at the same time, you mentioned only a few have done it. And I think too, it might not even be about how good he was, as much as it was just something about the position or particular situation that made it happen.

[SRJ]

I can understand it feeling a little humiliating, but at the same time, you mentioned only a few have done it. And I think too, it might not even be about how good he was, as much as it was just something about the position or particular situation that made it happen.

You are mostly right...she gets very excited with me watching,but the squirting is when the man is overly thick and it puts pressure on her clit . I love seeing how much pleasure she gets from the bigger guys and will do my part.

[SRJ]

I could write an essay on what I’ve learned since experiencing the stress squirting has caused me in my relationship. But I’ll try to get to the point.
Never squirted til I had good sex in my late 30’s. Men I’ve been with have loved it but my current bf is not a fan. I was never self conscious til him- however I didn’t necessarily like the mess either.
People are quick to vilify men who don’t like squirting, but honestly I sort of understand. People have preferences. He has not tried to shame me for it but I know it sort of is a turn off for him at this point and feel it is now harming our sex life. He has “not been in the mood” a few times now. When the hell is a man ever “not in the mood” if he is “into” his woman?! Definitely doing a number on my self esteem even though I have never had insecurities in that area. I’m a pretty attractive lady ?.
I squirt every time during sex and A LOT. I have tried advice to empty bladder, try other positions, etc but it has not reduced the “gush” lol.
My gyno (and her colleagues she reached out to) offered little help. She basically said it’s normal for some women, a lot of women suffer from dryness so insinuated I should feel lucky, and had no advice. I am scheduled to see a urogynocologust now and hope they will have some kind of advice.
But- what I have read online, is pelvic floor therapy/exercises can help control it.
So my question to those who are “gushers” like me- and don’t like it-
Did you find any advice helpful?
OR specifically-did you do pelvic floor exercises and did they help? If you did, how long did you have to do them as a routine before you noticed they were “working” or helping the issue?
Did you do them on your own from internet help or did a therapist teach you?
It’s been really stressful because while some tell me maybe I picked the wrong man- as in we aren’t compatible- and I should find a man who loves the squirting- obviously it’s not that simple. I love the man I have and want to make it work with him. Honestly, I personally get annoyed with the mess too. So…. Help!

In my opinion no lady should minimize her enjoyment or pleasure because a guy doesn't care for it. It's like saying u don't like the taste of his **** or cum. He is not going to change how he does that for u. And he should be able to accept that .

[JonnyR]

SRJ So you are saying that you have multiple partners with your wife at the same time? Do you guys also participate with other lovers solo? How did that come about and manifest? Has it gotten better over time or easier to deal with?

[Acesup]

On behalf of all men who aren't repressed and love women and love women's sexual pleasure. Please. For the love of God. Do not ever do anything to minimize or repress your unrestrained primal sexual release especially squirting. I am not in any way shape or form religious but if there is a god, the female orgasm and in particular gushing is the greatest evidence of God I have ever found because how could something so amazing evolve by accident.