[ames102]

Hello! My ex boyfriend and I were together for 6 months when I got pregnant, he freaked out left me and we stopped seeing each other for 2 months and got back together. I am no longer pregnant. I found out he had another girlfriend but we were together 90% of the time. I then found out that he was screwing several other girls after 2 months. He has said he loves me and cares about me. All and all we were together about a year. We are no longer seeing each other but I love him and want to be with him even though all this has happened. He has done a lot of things that hurt me and I have to him as well but only because of what he has done to me. I am not sure if I should continue talking to him or seeing him or what? If he cares why would he cheat so much or leave me high and dry when I got pregnant? This man is 47 and acts like a 20 year old and is very charming. We have a connection that is pretty much unbreakable and we do keep coming back to each other... What should I do? This is not healthy for me or him but I want him in my life...

[crzyredhead21]

First of all you have already stated that this reltionship is not good for you.... so by that statement you should already know that this is not what you need right now. A guy that bails when HE gets you pregnant AND cheats!? Run like girl! There's too many other people out there to put up with his problems!

[Guest]

Run Little Sister Run

Sister, please note that I'm trying to be very polite about this, and gentle.

It's obvious what you told us without spelling right out!

I'm very sadden by the fact if it was his child, he should have wanted to take the responsibility and he didn't, he run!
I'm not trying to put a guilt trip on you, we make choices in life and then we must live with them.
As far as I'm concerned he's not worth his grain in salt.
I realize he is not married to you, but this was his child.
What other woman did he get in this shape, I'm sorry but that just stirs up something with in me.

I'm going to confess something here so people don't feel like I'm point a finger. When I'm pointing a finger at him I'm also pointing 3 back at me.

I had a girl once many moons ago,we were going steady, boy that word isn't used anymore, ha! anyway she ended up in a family way. I didn't like it but she wanted to you know and wanted me to help pay, I did, I regretted it for the rest of my life. When I married my 1st wife the same thing happened, she wanted to do that, I said no way hosea we are going to get married and raise this child. She had the child, but of course the marriage was conceived thru lust, it lasted 3 yrs, but at least I tried. End of Story.(By the way I have a wonderful son by her who just recently had their 1st)

Again, what I'm trying to get at (and I'm having a hard time at expressing myself) is if this guy really cared about you, I mean really cared about you he would have done differently don't you think? He would have not ran off and play the , shame on him sister, but I'm trying to save you from grief in the future.
Find someone that really, I mean really cares about who you are, your health, your future, the real you.

I hope I've not hurt anyone's feelings here, opinions are like noses, everyone has 1 !

There's a bluegrass song we sing from time to time -
" There's more Pretty Girls than One" and so it is,
"There's more Pretty Studs than One"

If I'm off on understanding this, Please Forgive, but that's the way I read it!

I feel for ya, I really do! - Good Luck!

[crzyredhead21]

I totally agree with you In Need!! I had a silimar situation and I thank god every day for the choices I had to make to get the out of it!

Please ames.... think carefully about the questoin you are asking us. I think you already know the answer but need another angle on the question... which is totally fair! Just remember that life is too darn short to worry this much about a selfish ***hole that can only truly love himself. Let him go and move on!!

[ames102]

Thanks... yeah he is like a double sided sword for me... he was my best friend and my lover but he crushed me too...I don't know I stuck!

[CHANDLERS WISH]

You don't suck,

1) we always want what we can't have.
2) when they come back( cause sex is amazing as there is a bond), it confuses your mind into believing that "he loves me" more than the other girls that he sleeps with.

My first boyfriend was addictive haha... Ask my sister, some 11 or so years back and forth damd....

One day i actually found him discusting, i realised that as good looking as he was, as great as we were in bed, he sucked... that was about the time when i realised that other guys were paying a different attention, one of honesty, and still exciting, but non-cheaters and once I realised there was a lot better out there, i realised that it was just lustful sex that kept the ex and I "lusting" and going back.

Get out there and meet as many guys as you can, "not sleep with them off course" but start to see what is out there and trust me, you will note that this guy is not all that ....afterall.

CW

[Guest]

CW, she meant Stuck Not Suck, rofl !

[CHANDLERS WISH]

No... he "sucked" it is an Australian term for " no good" haha good on ya.. Now, I am ROFL.

lol... In-need.