[desert spirit]

How do you guys feel about this? I've always been attracted to older men. I started dating college guys when I was 15, and now rarely date anyone less than their mid-40's or so (I'm 31). I find that older men are more patient, more understanding, more willing to listen to me, less inclined to be full of machismo, and more knowledgeable in bed. If I feel like sitting in a coffee shop and discussing archeology or something, a guy my age would probably think I was crazy, but older men are more likely to have interests beyond their cars or football.

Not sure how this play out when I'm 60 .. lol ... but for now I much prefer older men over guys my age.

[WildChild]

Whatever works for you. Who knows when you are 60 maybe you'll reverse it an still date 40 somethings?

[happy ending]

be careful, i always dated older guys which worked well till i married one. when i was a energetic vibrant 40 - he was well over the hill. not good. but older men are great to date, they usually have more money and more ahem practice at the physical side of things.

[anonymouswhitefemale]

"More money and slept with more women"


Whoever said women were shallow, simple creatures .

[happy ending]

hey dont make generalisations, maybe i am simple and shallow, but its nice to be taken to nice places and not jumped on - by an oversexed youngster, especially after a few dates where i guy thinks he is doing you a favour by taking you to the local dive pub, and buying you a glass of cheap nasty wine, and then expects a night of passion. dating isnt difficult, and the more mature man seems to have worked this out.

[Guest]

I dont think it's simple or shallow, it's just a preference like anyone elses. Now there may be an "issue" down the road if it becomes a long term relationship, seeing as the life expectancy for men isnt as long as for women, but if both parties are aware of them ahead of time and go for it anyway, then good for them.

You may find as you get older, the age gap preference gets narrower. Maybe not.

Anyway, good for you. nothing wrong with it...

[CHANDLERS WISH]

You are who you are and you have the right to have a preference of "intelligence, charm and knowledge, with wisdom".. which a more "mature man has".

However, you may be very surprised if you don't have a "box" to put men in, because you may find that one day, someone a tad older only, or same age, or even a tad younger, or younger, has exactly what you are after.

Point being, don't look at the word "age" so much and look at the word "maturity".

I know 21 year olds that have their own mortgage, finished Uni, about to embark on an excellent career and by the time they are 31 will have the things you are speaking of.

It's not age, rather smarts, maturity and respect of what a woman is.

A MAN, would not take a WOMAN to a dive pub, with cheap wine, only someone whom has no class, and um brass polished thoughts. haha.

Money should not be the issue, rather the "man" seeing you as a real woman, someone whom deserves respect, has class.


CW

[anonymouswhitefemale]

hey dont make generalisations, maybe i am simple and shallow, but its nice to be taken to nice places and not jumped on - by an oversexed youngster, especially after a few dates where i guy thinks he is doing you a favour by taking you to the local dive pub, and buying you a glass of cheap nasty wine, and then expects a night of passion. dating isnt difficult, and the more mature man seems to have worked this out.

So, money is essential for any passion to take place, you must be wined and dined, at great expense for him to get your prizes. I'm sorry, but the term 'intellectual ' comes to mind. I appreciate that you want to be shown that you're special, but there's many ways men can do that aside from money, and I think expecting to have your fare paid by a wealthy man removes any respect you might have had.

Dating is difficult, because men and women are so different and women expect so much understanding, what the 'mature' man has realised, is how to deal with irrational women and more easily manipulate them.

The reason I think I am irritated by this behavious, is that, being 23, that means that I have to aim for 18-19 year olds, who hold no interest other than the phsyical. Girls a few years younger than me are totally stupid, and I resent the fact that they're my 'demographic' - because the girls my age have their eyes on shiney things and expensive wine.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Yeah but Anon i don't think she is stating that it is "money" rather respect and intelligence, but I will let her answer that hey.

I agree with her, you need to appreciate the "Culture" of different worlds. Australian Men are ****e, yep they are...

If they are younger then they are very immature they are settled into their sports, their cars/bikes we are spoilt in a way...

Younger men here are well, still being a lad, we are not important they haven't had the hardship you may have had, others may have had, they feel they can take it all and diss you.

Here in AUSTRALIA which is where she is from an older man understands more , it is different that UK, USA because we are bought up to be spoilt...

The men are bought up to take.

The women are bought up not to...

And, so she is searching simply for someone whom can treat her better than the younger generation of her age in AUSTRALIA.

Hard to explain if you don't live here.

But i don't believe for one minute that she is after money and success she never mentioned " he has to be a millonairre" or " be successful in business" she is stating exactly what i have experienced, lets take her to a low life pub buy cheat shirt and then try to kiss her and get her in bed, she is just a woman.

That my darl, is the typical AUSTRALIAN - Stupid been there seen it, ahhhhh can relate.

No morals, no understanding and no respect.

We live in diff worlds sorry.

CW

[anonymouswhitefemale]

And, well, I wish this was just about Australian men, since I find them really annoying already. We have a LOT of Aussies here in London, and they're quite disliked. why won't they stop talking about Australia?! They're complete misers as well.

I think money is the wrong way to gauge respect from a man. If he's got plenty of money, it means nothing for him to take you to a restaurant, it just show's he's willing to pay for the chance to have sex with you. It doesn't show that he respects you, desires you, gives you high importance etc.

But yes, I will agree, why be involved with a guy that can only talk about football, hang out at a dingy pub and who doesn't know his way around the bedroom. However, that is only a proportion of guys, it isn't every guy under the age of 30.