[Honda Dude]

From a guy

Well, couple things came to mind. Maybe he is working and cannot or does not want interuppted. I know personally, I generally do not socialize on the phone at work, texting or otherwise. Are you calling during work hours ? Another possibility is, are you calling when he is out with friends ? I know that guys are pretty tough in groups, and say things like "your whipped !" so, he may be trying to avoid a situation like that with his buddies.

[WildChild]

LOL. I've heard this, the so and so is p whipped and I just say, "oh dear". He says it so scathingly. Over time he's handed me the, "I can't be in a relationship", "we're just freinds", "no woman is controlling me". I just say, "of course not", "absolutely" and back off. Then I get a call, "what's going on? I haven't heard from you!", "what did I do now?" The response is, 'nothing, I've just been busy, you know I'm always thinking about you." I leave the titles and lables out of it. I don't have to call or text him all the time, I hear from him several times a day by his choice.

It's true though, the woman backing off can be a good thing for both. You find your balance. She finds out that he will communicate and often open up more if he doesn't feel backed against the wall and he will be more caring and attentive if he gets to set the pace. He, maybe without recognizing it or admitting it, finds that he is enjoys being with her when she isn't clinging and can he talk to her about some things more comfortably than with the guys.

Too many women do come off as desperate because they cling, they hold too tight. I think then there is a sense, for the man, that it isn't Him she cares about so much as she does 'having A man'. It's that any man will do. While that may not be true, who wants to feel that way?

[caterpillar79]

I think someone really meets his or her own match along the way. I just got past a clingy and manipulative relationship which drained my last energy. Now, I seem to have found a point to balance myself. But sometimes my sense of balance eludes me, where I tend to be the one clingy. Is this caused by episodal hormonal changes?

[caterpillar79]

Oh, Honda_Dude, we use our work email to communicate during work (shhhhh!) :-P
But I've always expected him to call me during the night preferably before bedtime. I love to be pampered in any way that he could, but sometimes, he meets his limits. He is much of a loner like me actually, he doesn't have a guys' night out. It actually is almost always OUR night out, where I am "one of the guys" - only a sexy one though.lol! (I'm a tomboy, which he finds cute).

This just bugs me to the max: Do men really think that women can "pick up" where they left off? Ladies, do you feel this way?

[caterpillar79]

As promised

Thank you all for your insights. BF is doing a great job to address this aspect of our relationship - kind of "doing what he promised" me. We have been in constant communication for a couple of weeks now, and are always in the thrilling anticipation of the weekends when we can be together again. Everything is doing well now.