[emelgee]

Hi there!

Seeking opinion on this situation:

There is a man who is flirting with me quite a lot - always friendly, smiling, physically affectionate and regularly surprises me with little sweet treats. I feel he is very respectful of me and concerned for my opinion and whenever I ask something of him, he always does exactly as I ask. I am a woman who likes to take my time getting to know a man and it seems to me that over the last month or so, this gent has been putting in some time and effort to win my trust, and I have been slowly getting more comfortable with him. But, he also dates other women, so I am just wondering how to balance his behaviour towards me with the knowledge that I have that he is dating other women. I suppose my concern is that because I am a pretty slow mover in relationships, that some other girl is going to perform a seagull manouvre and swoop in on someone I am starting to become interested in!!

All thoughts are welcome!
em

[emelgee]

Aha - I remember now!

Gosh - it has been a while since I was last "in the game", so to speak.

So, I'll reply to my own thread:

I remember now that he is just one of many men I know and I am just one of many women he knows. Nothing wrong with dating around and getting to know people - in fact, I really think it is a good time for me to be doing exactly that. No pressure, no expectations - just getting to know some interesting ppl. It's all good

Emm

[CHANDLERS WISH]

emelgee, welcome to the Forum.

It's a weekend, and alot of our regular threaders will be here tomorrow....

Being in Australia, I am here now

Your feeling a tad worried, nervous, I can see, but you are right.. The best way to ensure you succeed with someone you like, is to make them think they are not the only one. That you too are dating others. That you know who you are, and that you like him but your just keeping your options open, whilst being a lady which is important.

Alot of women think, if they don't move fast, they win... Then they have thoughts like you, shirt, what if someone manouvres quicker?

Well, then the interest between the two of you wasn't strong enough, or he wasn't after a relationship, just a woman who would go fast... so to speak.

Settle down and be confident, know who you are... Don't be frightened to say your busy, going away, but don't be frightened to flirt either so he knows your interested. The difference I think is in, sleeping with someone straight away, not showing an interest whilst confusing them and making them do a little chasing themselves, in that confusion.

CW

[jns]

Have you gone on dates with him? Have you discussed a relationship with him and decided to date exclusively? Do you want him to dump everybody he knows while you decide if you like him? It seems that jealousy may be coming into play well before it should and quite strongly.

[sourpuss]

Gosh - it has been a while since I was last "in the game", so to speak.

So, I'll reply to my own thread:

I remember now that he is just one of many men I know and I am just one of many women he knows. Nothing wrong with dating around and getting to know people - in fact, I really think it is a good time for me to be doing exactly that. No pressure, no expectations - just getting to know some interesting ppl. It's all good

Emm

I think this is the right attitude.

[emelgee]

Thanks CW and sourpuss
JNS - no jealousy; just some momentary confusion!
Emm