[holetoledo]

He told me it's something that he really wants to do--serve his country and earn enough money to go to graduate school. But I'm so scared. Every time he talks about it, he always warns me that anything can happen, he might die out there, that's always a risk in doing this. But he really wants to do it and I am struggling with my emotions.

What can I expect? How can I help myself cope with this?

[Mes T]

It seems to me that most soldiers don't actually do any fighting, or... anything dangerous at all. I suppose it really depends on where he is stationed. For example, I live in Korea right now, where there are TONS of US military. For what purpose they're here... I don't know. All anyone ever sees them do is drink and rape young Korean girls. Okay that's pretty harsh but it's the honest truth, here in South Korea...!

I suppose the biggest thing you have to worry about is how to keep the relationship going long-distance. Would you be okay with that aspect?

[rcoreyus]

Some soldiers do wind up in dangerous situations. If he understands the risk and is willing to accept it, then he is a brave man - a quality that I think we should admire more in people.

[holetoledo]

It seems to me that most soldiers don't actually do any fighting, or... anything dangerous at all. I suppose it really depends on where he is stationed. For example, I live in Korea right now, where there are TONS of US military. For what purpose they're here... I don't know. All anyone ever sees them do is drink and rape young Korean girls. Okay that's pretty harsh but it's the honest truth, here in South Korea...!

I suppose the biggest thing you have to worry about is how to keep the relationship going long-distance. Would you be okay with that aspect?

I would love to say yes and be sure, but the farthest he's ever been from me is Greece and that was for a little over one week. I love him a lot, I see me being with him for a long time, our families get along great. I'm still young though and I haven't even gone to grad school, I haven't even started settling down and that's what scares me, that things could be so unclear. We've been dating for a little over a year, and I know that's not a long time. Can't be too sure of anything.

After the Marines he wants to return to become a fire fighter in our town, but I keep thinking... What happens if he doesn't get that far? He's a very practical guy, and yesterday he told me that anything could happen, I should expect anything, he could die out there... And the whole thought of that made me burst into tears. I support him, yes, but I'm afraid. He's the bravest guy I know. He's really smart and he said with his background he can probably end up in intelligence, but like I said, anything can happen... I can't even imagine him holding a gun, but he wants to serve his country and I respect that.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

It's normal to be scared, he's making you feel that as well, he's scared, in his own way, support him, hold him and tell him, your proud, that you'll wait and that you have faith

Records in Australia for instance have shown 18 only have so far died, that's enough in this stupid war, but 18 is a small odd..

Be brave, share you love, love him and if anything god forbit ever happened, then just smile at his words, as if he knew and know you can move on, but in all honesty it's more of him saying he loves you, and goodbye if it was to happen, he's sharing his honest love for you...

This is going to be a hard time for you but embrase it with the love you have for him, I am sure that he needs you, needs your love, needs your belief he will come home..

Don't be afraid, instead of seeing him holding a gun,see him holding you.

CW

[SaharaJim]

I have a very bias viewpoint; but the M.C. has many virtues and can impart wonderful maturity on a young man. As for possible risks; sure they are "out there" but that is true of walking out your front door. A Marine is schooled to "adapt and overcome" what he encounters. And the "benefits' for service are pretty darned good. Fear is a natural reaction...but you can expect that in many things a young man does. IF you love him....support him in this.

[holetoledo]

Every time I get back on this thread, my eyes tear. Yes, it's hard, but I'm going to support him through this. I'm glad I have about two years for this to sink in, and I know his decision is not going to change because he is a very stubborn guy. And in no way would I want him to change his mind on account of me. I would never want to hold him back from doing something he wants to do, and I know that he would say the same for me. It's hard for me to think about all this though, especially since I'm on my period lol and I get so emotional! So I've been tearing up about this for two days straight. I feel like he and I have become so much closer, he's one of my best friends, and I just get so scared for him.. But I know this would also be a great opportunity for him. He's my tough guy. I believe in him.

[chelle21689]

When my boyfriend told me he was joining the Army I was scared for him because all i thought it was was infantry. He isn't infantry, he's Civil Affairs and that's more like humanitarian work, working with the locals, etc. Even though, I still worry because it's a war zone and anything can happen. But you know what? Anything can happen tomorrow...driving in your car every day is risky, walking down the street...you could get mugged, some psycho person stabs you, you could be safe at home and then some airplane crashes through your walls killing you. It's happened before...not trying to worry you but a lot of things can happen outside war zones.