My bf and I have been dating for 4.5 years. We have had a lot of fun and been very supportive of one and other. We have each been through a nasty divorce and have learned from them. We each have 2 kids living at home and lead busy lives. We have made time for each other and have gone on vacations alone and with our kids. We are in a committed relationship.
About 6 months ago he told me a mutual friend gave this woman his phone #. She called him up for a date and they began talking. I am not sure how long but I suspect about 1 month. He told me he was "curious" about this woman and wanted to see go further with her. I was upset but basically said do what makes your heart sing.
He never did and remained with me. I asked him not to have any further contact with her because she was looking for a partner, the main reason she contacted him. He said he was just a "friend" and he would do her best not to have contact. I said "do your best"? I said if you want to spend time her that's fine but I am out here. He never really promised he wouldn't and I didn't want to ask in fear of the answer. Time went on and a couple months later I found some texts on his cell phone to and from her. One was all I needed to see and it was to her inviting her to call him because he was childless and home alone sick.
I was again furious and told him he was a lying prick! We somehow starting working on it again. I told him AGAIN that if he wants female friends who call him up for dates that's fine but I don't want to be one of them. I gave him the choice.
A couple of months later I find an email from a different woman after they had been together. She said she was intrigued by their time together and had time to think about what they both wanted and where they would go from there. She said she meant what she said about no pressure that it was important to figure things out as friends first. Then she said she would explain more next time assuming he still wanted to meet again.
I lost it and became very upset. I confronted him and told him I was on his computer. He became very upset as well and accused me of being controlling and abusive. Both of us said things we regret now but that happens when emotions are high. I don't know what I did wrong other then being on his computer. Was he wrong to do what he did?
Help please!?!?
About 6 months ago he told me a mutual friend gave this woman his phone #. She called him up for a date and they began talking. I am not sure how long but I suspect about 1 month. He told me he was "curious" about this woman and wanted to see go further with her. I was upset but basically said do what makes your heart sing.
He never did and remained with me. I asked him not to have any further contact with her because she was looking for a partner, the main reason she contacted him. He said he was just a "friend" and he would do her best not to have contact. I said "do your best"? I said if you want to spend time her that's fine but I am out here. He never really promised he wouldn't and I didn't want to ask in fear of the answer. Time went on and a couple months later I found some texts on his cell phone to and from her. One was all I needed to see and it was to her inviting her to call him because he was childless and home alone sick.
I was again furious and told him he was a lying prick! We somehow starting working on it again. I told him AGAIN that if he wants female friends who call him up for dates that's fine but I don't want to be one of them. I gave him the choice.
A couple of months later I find an email from a different woman after they had been together. She said she was intrigued by their time together and had time to think about what they both wanted and where they would go from there. She said she meant what she said about no pressure that it was important to figure things out as friends first. Then she said she would explain more next time assuming he still wanted to meet again.
I lost it and became very upset. I confronted him and told him I was on his computer. He became very upset as well and accused me of being controlling and abusive. Both of us said things we regret now but that happens when emotions are high. I don't know what I did wrong other then being on his computer. Was he wrong to do what he did?
Help please!?!?
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