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  • passionz2sweet
    Junior Member
    • Oct 2010
    • 4

    Is Honesty always best???

    Hello everyone,

    So me and this guy just started officially dating. And we were having an pen discussion and he asked me how many guys i had been sexually involved with. I don't want to ever have to lie to him and a part of me wants to tell him ( its not a ridiculous # but its enough) because thats what makes me, me. but then I have a feeling it will make him think somewhat different about me, I mean is it really necessary for him to know?

    What do you think?
  • Olympia
    Veteran Member
    • Jun 2010
    • 1049

    Honesty is necessary...Do not start off a relationship with lies!
    Mutual respect is very, very important.

    But, the past is the past.. IMO, As long as you and he are STD free..
    You are with him now and should not live in the past or past involvements.

    Comment

    • passionz2sweet
      Junior Member
      • Oct 2010
      • 4

      Originally posted by Olympia
      Honesty is necessary...Do not start off a relationship with lies!
      Mutual respect is very, very important.

      But, the past is the past.. IMO, As long as you and he are STD free..
      You are with him now and should not live in the past or past involvements.

      Thank you I appreciate your advice..I guess sometimes I get confused on what the right thing to do and "playing the game" if you know what I mean. Im still young and new to dating so I'm still tryin to figure out what works. I have heard that being an open book is not always the best and that guys like a little mystery to keep things interesting.

      However, I do agree with you and yes we are both std free

      Comment

      • sourpuss
        Veteran Member
        • Dec 2006
        • 3581

        It's none of his business. You don't have to lie, but you don't have to talk about it either. I'm a firm believer in keeping the past the past.

        Comment

        • Guest

          Don't *mess up a relationship with lies.
          Last edited by sourpuss; 10-18-2010, 10:47 AM. Reason: getting around profanity filter

          Comment

          • sourpuss
            Veteran Member
            • Dec 2006
            • 3581

            Originally posted by sarah800
            Don't *mess up a relationship with lies.
            He shouldn't even ask her to begin with in my opinion.

            Comment

            • KMonte85
              Veteran Member
              • Oct 2009
              • 3303

              If you're uncomfortable telling him, then don't... or if you want to, but just not now - hold off on giving him any details until you're closer, more comfortable with each other, and he knows you better. Having just officially started dating, that is a pretty personal question to throw out there right off the bat.

              I'm all for keeping the number to yourself... it really isn't necessary that he knows, as long as he knows that you're STD free, which you've confirmed.

              Comment

              • idon't
                Member
                • May 2010
                • 64

                Tell him it's none of his business, firstly.And after all,did he tell you with how meny women he has been?If so, does he fear you'll take him for a ?Why should you be a and not him?If he ever judges u on that, he's not worth you.Your past is part of u and he should accept it.

                Comment

                • Kallygirlie
                  Veteran Member
                  • Jun 2009
                  • 421

                  Whatever you do, do not lie to him. Its up to you if you want to tell him. I believe he has a right to ask but you dont have to answer. Maybe he's just curious as to how experienced you are. theres lots of reasons why a someone would ask this. If he can end a relationship over your past then is this really someone you want to continue with?
                  Krystal

                  Comment

                  • WildChild
                    Banned
                    • Sep 2008
                    • 14142

                    Tell you've slept with half the guys on the planet and had plans to try the other half until he came along and messed it up, so you are expecting him to make it up to you.

                    Comment

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