[Guest]

A man's perspective on your "follow up"

We men need the dots placed real close together in order to see a line. MOST men like conversations about anything, at any time, to be short, direct and to the point because we only process so much meaningful information at once.

Dropping hints, inferring this, implying that, doesn't work. If you want to be exclusive, say so. Your timing may not be great (early, late, whatever) but at least you've made it clear. No man can say that they didn't understand the word exclusive.

As for you being a one - at - a - time woman, all the better for us. Am I dating anyone else? NO, but I may be sleeping with someone else. Again, and I know it sounds rediculous....be more direct with your line of questioning.

Most men I know like to give direct answers to direct questions.

[snowlady]

Depending on your gut feeling about this guy see how he reacts you saying "It really upsets me you hooked up with other people, that doesn't work for me. But since we didn't talk about staying exclusive, I will try to move past it BUT ONLY if you are willing to be committed to me from here on out." How he reacts will let you know what to do.

You have to remember, girls usually work definitely than guys. Meaning they hookup and dont have an emotional attachment.

[BasketCase]

I completly agree with hopeless. These things should always be communicated before intimacy. If the man were simply taking these other women (and yourself) on dates, then no, the scale would be low. But sleeping with them brings in a whole lot of other complications.

[BasketCase]

But I say when you speak to him do not expect much. If he were truly interested in commiting to you he would not have hooked up with other women. You shouln't be mad but don't assume he will choose to commit.