This has been brought up rather too agressively but I would like to revisit it. I've talked a couple men I know who are in the category of being good men. They are caring and attentive and just good, and of different generations. Because my curiosity was aroused, I asked them, if they thought that men are reluctant to ask women out because of fear of being charged with harrassement. They both responded, Yes, very strongly. In discussion many of the same things came out, they and men they know are choosing to basically stay home and be frustrated, rather than to try to date. They both knew of men who had an arrangement with a prostitute, rather than to try to develop a relationship with a woman. They expressed fear of being trapped with an "accidental" pregnancy, being used, or finding themselves in legal trouble.
They both expressed that they would not approach a woman who essentially didn't approach them first or even flat out ask them out and that other single men they knew had essentially the same feeling. We talked about the fears that women have of being hurt, abused, or used as a booty call. We also talked about how women who are comfortable with their sexuallity and up front about it but not overtly sexy risk being treated like a ho.
Granted two good men and their friends do not make a definite trend but I'm wondering how common is this? If a significant number of good men and good women are all backing out of dating or trying to form relationships, that increases the chances that the good ones who are still trying will encounter more toxic people. We live in a time of change, the roles that women and men have filled for generations are changing, there are a lot of nasty old ideas still embeded in the culture and a lot of confusion in how to deal with each other now,
My questions are:
Is this a trend?
Are good men reluctant to or have even stopped aproaching women?
Are good women also reluctant to get involved?
Any thoughts on how this can be overcome?
They both expressed that they would not approach a woman who essentially didn't approach them first or even flat out ask them out and that other single men they knew had essentially the same feeling. We talked about the fears that women have of being hurt, abused, or used as a booty call. We also talked about how women who are comfortable with their sexuallity and up front about it but not overtly sexy risk being treated like a ho.
Granted two good men and their friends do not make a definite trend but I'm wondering how common is this? If a significant number of good men and good women are all backing out of dating or trying to form relationships, that increases the chances that the good ones who are still trying will encounter more toxic people. We live in a time of change, the roles that women and men have filled for generations are changing, there are a lot of nasty old ideas still embeded in the culture and a lot of confusion in how to deal with each other now,
My questions are:
Is this a trend?
Are good men reluctant to or have even stopped aproaching women?
Are good women also reluctant to get involved?
Any thoughts on how this can be overcome?
pfttttt..
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