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  • classy_lady
    Member
    • Jun 2009
    • 24

    question

    Do you agree with this: When a guy says I'll call you next time I'm in <insert city>, it means he is "breaking up" with you politely, right? I mean if he really were serious about you and making a relationship, even long distance, work he would call you again now, make specific plans. He would not risk losing you to someone else. Also, I wonder what is the best thing to say to someone like that. Afterall, you are a great valuable woman, not a dress on lay-away they reserve for whenever they want or are around. I thought something short but to the point would be "sorry not interested. Good luck." Would appreciate your opinion. Guys I would like to hear you too ;-)
  • WildChild
    Banned
    • Sep 2008
    • 14142

    If he's going to call you next time he's in town then he enjoys your company, probably as a "date". But if you've had sex then it's probably more you are on the list as casual sex partner. Nothing wrong with that if its what you want and you are safe about it.

    Comment

    • classy_lady
      Member
      • Jun 2009
      • 24

      No there was no sex. It was a long distance to-be relationship that he wanted and was very enthusiastic about. He said he knew it would take some effort, but frankly, "I'll call you next time I'll be in your town" sounds like an end to it. It's less than flattering to be called whenever it's convient for him. I hate his cocky attitude and I'm not going to put my life on hold for him until whenever he feels like showing up. Do you also see his attitude as an insult?

      Comment

      • Colorado
        Veteran Member
        • Nov 2010
        • 460

        Originally posted by WildChild
        If he's going to call you next time he's in town then he enjoys your company, probably as a "date". But if you've had sex then it's probably more you are on the list as casual sex partner. Nothing wrong with that if its what you want and you are safe about it.
        I agree with WC - Taking into account there was no sex involved - maybe he is wishing to take the opportunity during his trips to get to know you (date) and then maybe take it further - but I have to wonder... if this is the case - then I would be calling more than just during each visit. I would have to say "he enjoys your company".

        Comment

        • Ashlee T.
          Veteran Member
          • Dec 2008
          • 6412

          He's either not all that interested, or just seeing it much more casually than you are in a "getting to know you" sort of way. However, you are the only one who knows the discussions between the two of you leading up to this, if he gave you the impression he was very serious about you, then after meeting gave you a different impression, then chances are he's decided he's not all that interested.

          Not everyone is right for us. Afterall, like you said, you are a great valuable woman, and deserve to spend your time on someone who deserves it and appreciates it.
          "Be what you're looking for."

          Comment

          • classy_lady
            Member
            • Jun 2009
            • 24

            We did not meet yet. Only spoke on the phone. And even on the last phone call he was pushing for this to work. Anyways, thanks for your input :-)

            Comment

            • classy_lady
              Member
              • Jun 2009
              • 24

              Originally posted by Colorado
              "- but I have to wonder... if this is the case - then I would be calling more than just during each visit. ".
              My point exactly! A relationship is either on or off, not "on demand" whenever he feels like it. Frankly, I was not too thrilled about the whole long-distance relationship in the first place.

              Comment

              • Ashlee T.
                Veteran Member
                • Dec 2008
                • 6412

                Are you sure he's not married?

                The whole thing just doesn't make sense really..
                "Be what you're looking for."

                Comment

                • classy_lady
                  Member
                  • Jun 2009
                  • 24

                  He said he wasn't and I'm not the type to have anything to do with married men. But frankly, I don't care anymore. I cut my losses here and move on. He is just not worth my time. Thank you all for your responses :-)

                  Comment

                  • CHANDLERS WISH
                    • Mar 2008
                    • 22440

                    So effectively your stating that you've been talking on the phone getting to know each other, you weren't keen on long distance relationships, he said it's not a problem, they require work but he was prepared to put in that effort and on the last phone call, he stated he'd call you when he's in your town..

                    I imagine you met on a dating site?

                    What, if it's a surprise? What if he intends to visit your town this week, as a surprise? It's possible....

                    If not, then I'd say, he's changed his mind, flirting with other girls as well and someone else has his attention..........

                    CW
                    PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

                    Comment

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