[Little_Miss_Me]

So, I've had the worst luck in the dating world for sometime. Being fairly stuck on my ex was largely apart of the reason, so I was floored when I met someone who... is everything I've been looking for (so far).

We met, made a bit of small talk, and I gave him my number. Couple days later, he calls to see if I'd like to go out for drinks, and we did. We had a great time. He was funny, polite, just as into me as I was him. Hours went by, and it felt like it was only seconds.

So, about four hours after we had met up, he gets a phone call from one of his buddies. Talks to them, makes some plans for later on in the evening, and when he gets off the phone, he asks if I'd like to come with him. I say no, just because I thought we had spent plenty of time together for a first date. I didn't want to push it seeing as almost every date I've been on has turned out disastrous in the past few months, lol.

He leans in, kisses me. Instant fireworks. "Please?" knows how to get what he wants.... and I loved it.

So I gave in and said yes. Since it was far out, I rode with him. The entire time he's giving me warnings about his buddies. "We're all in the navy, so they love drinking. They diss everyone that walks into the room, doesn't matter who you are. Oh, yeah, and the last girl so-n-so brought over got ragged on so hard she ing cried." I assumed he was exaggerating. Regardless, if there's anyone that likes to kick back and have a good time, it's me. So I wasn't too concerned. I'm confident in myself, and well, I don't take myself seriously at all, so I can handle a few jokes at my expense.

I get there, and the thrashing begins. I'm pretty witty, so I slung the insults right back at them. The meaner they were, the harsher mine became. Soon enough, I passed initiation without much of a problem. "WE LOVE THIS GIRL!"

And then, it didn't stop. They diss'd each other. Non stop. Were rude like, "Hey you gonna (edit) our boy tonight? Why you holding back, blah blah blah." Granted, yeah, they were drinking. One of 'em snatched my purse, and started digging stuff out of it. After nicely getting it back, a few minutes later he went to pull something out of it, I grabbed my purse because it's annoying for a complete stranger to go through your(edit) purse, he started playing tug-of-war with it, and snapped the freaking strap in half. Laughed and threw it at me. My date was like, "Dude that's an (edit) move, sit the (edit) down." Which was nice, but then I was thinking, why the would he even let someone meet these guys on a first date if they're this (edit) bad?

We got into the car, and I straight up asked him, "Are they always like this?" (I did it with a slight laugh so it didn't sound (edit) And his response, "Hahahahaha, ALWAYS." And I know this is the group of guys he hangs out with on a regular basis.

Great. So, Mr. Right comes waltzing up, and he's got the cargo of a bunch of morons.

Should I even freaking bother?

[Guest]

Nope.

[LadyLena]

I think something you also may think aoubt IS, he came across to you semi nice, but I think could have been a bit more protective of you,.. but liek I was saying, DOES HE ACT this way when one of the other guys brings a date a round , seems that the real question here. If he's just liek them, Let him go and move on.

[WildChild]

I really have to wonder why he would expose you to this.
I'm a lot older than you. I recently started dating a man who has quite a bunch of buddies, guys he's known since grade school or earlier, so they are in his life forever. I've met his closest friend, who was very nice. But he has some others that he has described to me and told me that it may be a while before I meet them because he doesn't want them to put me off. He cares about the impression they would make on me and how they might conduct themselves.

When a man cares for you he is protective to a degree and cares about you being treated with respect. This guy you went out with sounds like he was seeing how much you could take. What do you think he would have done if you hadn't been able to handle it? He may have been testing you, but do you want your life to be a test? Do you want to have to deal with this immature and irresponsible behavior long term? Do you want to date a man that you know is hanging out and acting this when you aren't together? Do you want to be with a man who may treat other women as his friends treated you? How long before he starts treating you this way?

[Guest]

Let me put this to you in several other ways.....

"Great. So, Mr. Right comes waltzing up, and he's got the cargo of a bunch of morons."

You (HE) are only as good as the company you keep...

It takes one to know one and he knows a bunch of them...

Do you really want to be subjected to this type of behavior on a regular basis?

What happened to being loved? Honored? Cherished? Respected?

[Mighty Grasshopper]

Nope.

AGREED. Future self will thank you.

[Hopeless Dork]

I don't think they would act that way around any women that they had any respect for... they would at least tone it down, quite a bit, around someones wife or serious gf, etc.. they wouldnt dig through her purse.. talk down to her.. light ribbing, fine... but they wouldn't go hard. I think even though you 'handled' your own, him not having enough respect for you to tell his buddies to chill out... is a HUGE red flag.

It sounds like either he saw you as just a fling, or they did... either that or they are just all extremely clueless. I am a silly girl and I love to joke around a lot... but I would be mortified at having to be on my toes ALL night... having to literally fight for my purse etc.. it sounds rediculous. Whether or not you could handle it is really besides the point... its why should HAVE to handle that... on a first date no less.

You shouldn't have to be 'one of the guys' , ur not a navy buddy... you are a female he's interested in... and he should be trying to impress you not seeing how much slop you can take.