[Guest]

Elanor-Jane,

Are you telling that you can't tell when people don't shower?


Take care,

Taos

[rosekitten]

Elanor-Jane,

Are you telling that you can't tell when people don't shower?


Take care,

Taos

I think her point was "how can you tell if they shower every day." I'm one who doesn't shower daily, but there's also no need for me to. I don't do strenuous activity very regularly, so I don't sweat. I don't wear make-up, use product, etc. so there's little need for a daily shower. I've never had anyone even notice, or care. So, is it "hey, did you shower today?" when you go out on a date? lol

[Guest]

Hi rosekitten,

It might just be a function of where I live and with whom I hang. I live in a So Cal ski resort town. In the summer it can get warm. And when I drive to OC, I have to traverse the Inland Empire, which is always hot. And I usually associate with active people who lead healthy lifestyles. The gym at the country club where I work out is usually overrepresented by women.

I can understand your rationale for not showering every day, but I don't agree with it. For disease purposes alone, people should shower at least once a day. You might want to check with your physician, by mine, who is drop dead gorgeous, told me that some of her patients don't shower daily regardless of her entreaties to adhere to hygiene habits that are conducive to good health. God only knows how many germs we pick up throughout the day including staph & MRSA.

BTW, a woman I used to date asked me right before we worked out together for the first time if I minded that she sweated when she worked out. She said that she had dated men who didn't like to see her sweat. I replied of course not, that I expected her to sweat when she worked out. The shower after was always fun. This woman is an RN, and she does know the importance of healthy hygiene habits. Like me, she showered at least twice a day. But then again, I love to get dirty. But the second I'm done doing whatever I'm doing that causes me to get dirty, I have to shower. And I always shower before bed or I can't sleep. And I usually take one the first thing in the morning. It anything, a warm shower in the morning helps me get going.

This is how my mileage rolls. It's apparent that others have hygiene habits with vastly different mileage. If it's working out for them, who am I to disagree? I just don't have to date 'em.


Take care,

Taos

[Guest]

BTW,

Socrates opined that wisdom begins when one admits how much s/he doesn't know. Hence, the essence of Socratic debate, which is a knowledge-gaining process. Therefore, I am always willing to listen to differing viewpoints on any issue. I know there's a lot I don't know. I would be cheating myself were I to neglect listening to anyone who might teach me something I ought to know. The caveat here is that Socratic debate should always be sans argumentum ad hominem. One should never attack the arguer. One should only attack the arguer's argument.

I know I could sit across a table from Little for hours and engage in stimulating conversation and debate, and we would never entertain the notion of personal attack. It's always a good idea to extend honor and respect to everyone, even those with whom one does not agree.


Jus' sayin'...

Taos

[Little]

I will admit that you confound me. I would not have assumed you to be prejudicial and intolerant. What would be your defense for harboring such extreme prejudice and intolerance of social conservatives? Viewers of Fox News? And what proof do you have that would link the male populations of those groups to misogyny?

I live in a section of the country ripe with social conservatives and have a great deal of experience socializing with them. Every single social conservative I know, male or female, has misogynistic ideas or tendencies, often ones they won't admit are misogynistic. Moreover, their ideas about how to treat others, as exhibited through their politics as well as their everyday actions, leave me often unable to even be friends with them, much less date them. I have trouble even being civil to people who insist on bringing ultraconservative social ideas to the table. A mutual agreement not to discuss politics is the only way I can hope to befriend them. This lack of discussion would not be good for a relationship.
Also, certain Tea Party elected officials in many states, notably Georgia, are literally waging war on women's rights. The laws they're trying to pass could easily be used to put menstruating women in front of a judge each month, asking them to prove they did nothing to begin a pregnancy during the cycle and that they did nothing that would end a pregnancy. I wish I was being hyperbolic or over-exaggerating, but I'm not. All of this is brought on by a fanatical view of Christianity that espouses a government not unlike the Sharia law practiced in Muslim countries. I personally would be victimized by a government like this, and if the wrong people are elected in the next decade, I would move my family to another country to avoid it.

Which brings me to a point I forgot: I won't date anybody who subscribes too strongly (or whose family subscribes too strongly) to any Abrahamic religion. Since I typically have a hard time relating to my fellow Pagans, I routinely dated atheists and agnostics.

[Guest]

It is a worthwhile endeavor to reflect upon why we believe what be believe and perform periodic assessments to determine whether our beliefs are still valid. I'll go slightly tangential and explain.

The infamous Broad Street pump in Victorian London birthed the study of epidemics, which birthed the medical specialty of epidemiology. Lack of good hygiene habits is a substantial contributor to epidemics. This is borne out in studying warfare. Many more soldiers and civilians die due to disease than battle wounds.

We live in constant battle with pathogens. Therefore, we must take advantage of all methods available to us to keep ourselves healthy. And we must always be mindful of the bromide our mothers used to instill in us: an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure!

Both men and women have to be extremely careful when shaving. While not that common, opportunistic bacteria on our skin does look for portals allowing entry into our bodies. Necrotizing faciitis can be contracted by the entry through the tiniest portal. Ditto MRSA and staph, the latter of which nearly killed President Reagan. Therefore, it's always wise to shower before shaving, thoroughly washing what's to be shaved. Women have begun to shave their forearms. Pay close attention to all cuts on hands and arms because they are areas of our bodies that are generally most likely to become contaminated by pathogens. If you shave your forearms and nick yourself, keep the wound clean and pay attention to it. Be extremely cautious of cuts around the pubic region. Gravity pulls sweat downward. If pathogens are on your body and are washed downward with sweat and trapped in your pubic region, it's not unlikely for an infection to occur. And it's a good idea to assure an ingrown hair is just that and not the incipient phase of an infection.

Always shave with a clean razor. If it's been laying around your shower for a few days or longer, soak it in rubbing alcohol before use. Always discard rusty and dull razors. You're most likely to cut yourself with a dull razor than a sharp one. Never share razors except with your spouses or sons/daughters. I knew a woman who would only share her razor with her daughter. If her ex-husband used her razor, she'd get a new one. She was extremely attentive to the spread of pathogens.

I hope this helps explain why I am cautions when it comes to personal hygiene. I will often come home covered in dirt. But the minute I get through the front door I'm shower bound.

BTW, when I was in my early 20's, a girl around my age told me that women can be prone to infection due to men whom don't thoroughly wash their penises, especially uncircumcised men. Apparently bacteria flourish under the foreskin of uncircumcised men which is transferred to women during sex. Is this in fact true? The girl who told me this told me that she used to get a lot of vaginal infections from her old boyfriend. Finally her physician diagnosed that her infections were coming from him.


Take care,

Taos

[Guest]

I'm with Little on the misogyny and Fox nonNews, if you have questions about this do a search on their origins, brainwashing the masses is part of their concept.

Its a big, scary world out there for you, isnt it.

My deal-breakers are being judgmental and critical of others.

[Little]

BTW, when I was in my early 20's, a girl around my age told me that women can be prone to infection due to men whom don't thoroughly wash their penises, especially uncircumcised men. Apparently bacteria flourish under the foreskin of uncircumcised men which is transferred to women during sex. Is this in fact true? The girl who told me this told me that she used to get a lot of vaginal infections from her old boyfriend. Finally her physician diagnosed that her infections were coming from him.

The intact penis is extremely easy to keep clean. Pull back foreskin and rinse. Anybody who doesn't do this is either uneducated or lazy. Doctors who make a villain of an intact penis are acting on outdated ideas and information. To cut off an infant's foreskin, the foreskin has to be RIPPED off the head, causing scar tissue to develop and sensitivity to lessen. If a man desires circumcision without medical necessity, it should be left to his decision as an adult and after the foreskin has naturally separated. Anything less is mutilation.

Its a big, scary world out there for you, isnt it.

My deal-breakers are being judgmental and critical of others.

Isn't this what this thread is all about? Dealbreakers entail judgement and being critical. Those shouldn't be dirty words. If you're neither judgmental nor critical, you'd not have deal breakers at all. We're entitled to our opinions and you're entitled to yours. And that first line looks a LOT like a personal attack.

In fact, here, you practically endorse judgement and being critical! What gives?

What do we look for in a mate that isnt shallow to some extent? Height, body type, smile, eyes, facial symmetry are all purely cosmetic and superficial. I will also argue that intelligence is genetically predetermined, does that mean preferring to date smarter people is vain and superficial? I would also suggest that a person's sense of humor is developed when they are young, and it isnt something most people choose to shape in their own way. At least the size of one's pocketbook is something they have most likely earned on purpose. Is dating for money less vain than dating for intelligence? Basically, the things that we look for in a mate that ARE NOT genetically predetermined (I am inferring shallow from genetic predisposition as we have no control over our genes) are things that can and do and change over a person's life. If you choose your mate solely on variables that change, how can you know what you are getting?

Im not saying we should condone people basing their choices purely on one physical trait or another, but people shouldn't have to apologize for what, they feel, they like.

[Guest]

Little,

As politely as I can, allow me to suggest that you believe a lot of things that are not true. For instance, tell me where I can research the menstruating woman thing. Knowing what I know about law and civil liberties, that would be a blatant Fourth Amendment violation. Little, there is absolutely no intellectual basis nor is there any factual proof linking social conservatism to misogyny. If anything, it is nothing more than opinion that completely lacks validity. If you know of and credible research that has supported such a hypothesis, I'd wish that you'd put me onto it.

Little, maybe you might want to engage in a little introspection. I do suspect that you have a lot of prejudices. Moreover, you might want to consider being more tolerant of people who hold viewpoints in opposition to yours, especially your lack of toleration of those who are loyal to their God. After all, this nation was founded by devoutly religious men who were guided by Judeo-Christian beliefs. James Madison, who wrote both the Constitution and Bill of Rights, was devoutly religious. He believed that this nation was created by the hand of God. Since nearly 80% of Americans align themselves with Christianity, the cogent argument is that your beliefs are extreme. And while they might be, that would not preclude my befriending you.

Galileo was persecuted by the Catholic Church for his scientific research that proved the Copernicus' research that our solar system is geocentric and not heliocentric as was the position of the Vatican. He was imprisoned by the church and threatened with death due to heresy. He convinced the Pope that his scientific research was not antithetical to the Bible. In fact, he crafted a very cogent argument that it will be science that disproves evolution. Some scientists have come up with what appear to be credible theories in support of evolution. But when it comes time to put up or shut up, well, they ain't doin' much puttin' up.

Little, allow me to suggest that you keep Socrates in mind. Knowledge is the product of reasoned debate. If one were to exclude reason, then, logically, the debate would not produce knowledge.

I might not agree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.
***Voltaire***



Take care, Little,

Taos

[Guest]

Isn't this what this thread is all about? Dealbreakers entail judgement and being critical. Those shouldn't be dirty words. If you're neither judgmental nor critical, you'd not have deal breakers at all. We're entitled to our opinions and you're entitled to yours. And that first line looks a LOT like a personal attack.

In fact, here, you practically endorse judgement and being critical! What gives?

My quoted passage was to point out the hypocrisy in how some people establish genetic traits that are deemed "okay" to place higher value on others. Furthermore, it has little to no bearing on my disagreement here with being judgmental of a persons life choices and, most ridiculously, choice in tele channel.

And, if that was a personal attack, I apologize, but it reinforces my point