[lvt09]

thing is I LOVE HIM and i know he loves me i just don't want to make the wrong decision just b/c he act weird the last month...I mean i just dont know if it fair bc i havent heard his side ....dealing with his finals and dealing with family maybe he just cant handle all the pressure that has been put on him. He doesnt deal with this kinda thing well so maybe this is him pushed to the limit. I just dont want me to think back at this and be WHAT IF

[lizzardb63]

Sounds like you're making excuses for him to justify the way he's been acting. You can't always wonder "What if" because if its meant to be, it will be (as cliche as that sounds...its true). If a break is needed, take a break. It would be for the better of the relationship eventually if it does work out.

[KMonte85]

I have to agree with lizzard, lvt.

You're excusing his behavior, saying it's because he's young, he's under a lot of stress, he's been taught to flee conflict from his parents....


An excuse is not a justification. He is treating you poorly, he is not even meeting BASIC relationship needs, and you are here telling us you've had enough.

He could have 1,000,000 excuses, but not one is good enough if it means you have to be unhappy in your relationship with him. You deserve to be happy, you deserve to be with someone who loves you, cares for you, and thinks you and your feelings actually matter (because they do). Don't be scared to tell him that he has to change his ways or you will walk. Give him the benefit of the doubt if you think it would be fair, but he must be willing to hear you out, and he must be willing to make some changes, make you feel like you're a priority in his life. If he can't do these things, then the only option you have is to move on and find a man who cares for you as much as you do him.

[Adillon0698]

The above comments are right on. This guy seems to be leaving you hanging as back up, maybe when he is lonely or needs some type of company. The thing he said about being friends IS a HUGE pointer in my opinion. It almost sounds like he wants this relationship to end, but not fully, and on his terms. If I were you I would confront him with his options one last time. Tell him your needs, desires, and how you're feeling. Ask him if he is willing to commit to this relationship and put forth the effort. I would take his answer and run with it, not making excuses. If he decides it is worth it and is willing, keep your effort in as well. If not, as hard as it may be let it go. It not fair for any person to feel like this in a relationship nor is his behavior okay IMO. Sadly too many men or young boys tend to see treating women like this is all too easy and they are able to get away with it. Have you considered maybe he is seeing someone else? It's a possibility. You say he loves you, and maybe he is just stressed out. Having some separation from you id say would be normal if that is the case. But for him to do suggest friendship and stop with all of the affection, ignore your cries for help Would leave me to believe he has changed his mind on the relationship. I am no expert but I wish you the best of luck!