About a year and a half ago I was dating this guy for a couple months, we kept it casual and it never turned into anything serious. I did have feelings for him but I was never too sure how he felt about me. We eventually just stopped talking. Last weekend I ran into him while I was out and all these feelings came back. So much more than before though, I got butterflies and just seeing him felt so good. We hung out all night and we ended up sleeping together. I know I probably shouldn't have just jumped right back into bed with him but with how good he made me feel and a mixture of alcohol it just.. kind of happened. Afterwards we stayed up talking until 6am. He told me how much he missed me and how good it feels to see me again. Everything felt so different and good and just perfect.
I woke up at 9am and quietly left. I wasn't sure if it was just a one night stand and I didn't want to over stay my welcome. He called me later that day, I accidentally left my make up bag there and he told me I could come get it. I drove over to go get it, it was a little bit awkward and I only stayed for about 15 minutes. He texted me later that night saying 'I've missed you' and I replied saying 'I've missed you too' and that was it. The next two days we didn't talk at all. On Wednesday he texted me asking me what I was doing that night and I told him I was at work till 10 and then he never replied. On Thursday night I texted him 'What are you doing tonight?' and he didn't answer for 3 hours and when he did he finally said 'I'm on my way home, you can come over if you want'. I told him I was out with my friend, I didn't have my car and if he wanted to see me to come pick me up. He texted me back 'sorry' and I didn't reply.
The next night, Friday, he called me around 10pm asking me to come to his friend's house, he was having some people over. I went over with my friend, it was a little awkward at first, we didn't know anyone there. He sat next to me on the sofa, we talked and drank a little then about 20 minutes later he disappeared. After noticing he's been gone for about 15 minutes I decided to go look for him. He was downstairs on the phone. I didn't think much of it but I asked him why he invited me over if he was just going to be on the phone the whole time, he told me he'd be back upstairs in a few minutes. I went back upstairs, he never came. His friend asked me if he knew where he was because they wanted him to go pick up some more beer. I walk back downstairs and he's still on the phone. I was kind of upset at this point, I asked him who he was talking to and he kind of got an attitude with me. I had a feeling it was a girl and I asked him if it was. Turns out it was a girl. I went back upstairs to get my friend, I was upset and I just wanted to leave. At this point his friend is asking me where his money is and if he left yet. It just kind of turned into this huge mess. This guy thought he stole his money, my friend being drunk and wanting to yell at my guy, just a MESS. I got 5 minutes to pull him aside and ask him what he wants like what is going on. I told him I did like him but if he's dating some girl and last night was just a one night stand to tell me. He ended up telling me that he's been talking to this girl for a couple months, she lives about 2 hours away from where we live and he hasn't even met her yet (not even sure if not meeting her is true). He said he felt like he had a connection with her and he feels stuck between the two of us. He said that the other night did mean something, that he's always cared about me, he's just feels stuck between a rock and a hard place. Then this other guy came down getting in his face about taking his money and all this stuff. The guy wanted to fight him (I guess drunk guys just being drunk guys?) The guy I liked was not having it and just got into his car and left. So I left with my friend. When I got home my friend said to text him. I texted him something like.. I need an answer with whats going on, I care about you but if you want to be with this girl just tell me so I don't look like an idiot and we can just end this now. He called me 20 minutes later telling me he was sorry and I just told him he has no right to mess with my head and feelings. He told me he called the other girl and said he didn't want to do this anymore, he wants me and only me, blah blah blah. He said he was tired and that he would call me tomorrow. He never called.
I haven't talked to him since Friday night. I'm not going to call him or text him because I feel like he should. I don't want to look clingy and psycho. I'm just so confused about all of this. I haven't had feelings like this for a guy in a long time. I want to give up and just say whatever, he's just not that into me, but I don't know. My heads is telling me to just let it go but my heart says just hold on a little longer. I just feel like.. if it felt so right to me he had to feel something, that all he said can't be lies. Or maybe I'm just being stupid and naive about it. Just someone give me advice or an opinion about any of this. Just something not sugar coated like 'he's scared' or whatever.. Thanks.
Also sorry this turned out to be a book ugh
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