[LanaBear]

Yeah, I think you just need to leave it be at this point... Sucks because you don't exactly know the what's or why's, but the last thing you want to be is annoying. Leave it at that and hope that she contacts you.

[BabyGirl]

Sometimes,
Things are not to be Contacted about.
Her **** may be a Protection for herself and You also.
If an HR problem is involved, especially about a Co worker or any Internal Things that may show or have to do with " Sexual Harassment or Behavior ".

Her having a New Boyfriend ( you ) in the " Picture " could be her Demise with any Sexual Actions, if accused in the Workplace.

She, again may just be Protecting herself, her Job and then will be able to continue with You, if you are willing to stick around.

I'd just step away, for a bit, Let her know you are a Friend First.. If you Care in that way. She may well not want the Drama. And then again, you could be Involved in More Drama than you ever Want.

[I_Am_A_Man]

Sometimes,
Things are not to be Contacted about.
Her **** may be a Protection for herself and You also.
If an HR problem is involved, especially about a Co worker or any Internal Things that may show or have to do with " Sexual Harassment or Behavior ".

Her having a New Boyfriend ( you ) in the " Picture " could be her Demise with any Sexual Actions, if accused in the Workplace.

She, again may just be Protecting herself, her Job and then will be able to continue with You, if you are willing to stick around.

I'd just step away, for a bit, Let her know you are a Friend First.. If you Care in that way. She may well not want the Drama. And then again, you could be Involved in More Drama than you ever Want.

OK here is an update for you ladies: I just found out (confirmed my suspicion) that an ex-bf is back in the picture. I did not find out through her but I confirmed through my friend (who dates her roommate) that her ex-bf from college - a guy she dated for 3 yrs - is currently in town for a while and will be moving on to a new city soon. So while it seems temporary, I don't know if I want to wait around for her. If she is ready to get serious and I am available at that time, I will reconsider.

We weren't technically exclusive but I think it was headed that way. We never officially discussed it though. I know she has seen him at least once since he returned but I am almost positive she has slept with him. Should I be upset about this? Would I be unreasonable to hold that against her? We weren't exclusive and we aren't in love or anything - and honestly I'm not too upset about it - but do you think it would be fair game to bring up to her the question "did you sleep with him?" and be upset with her if she says "yes?" I'm not sure how I feel about this but I do value your input on the situation. Chances are, since he is moving, she will come back to me but I don't know how I should act. Do I get mad at her for being so secretive and not straightforward or do I let it go and try and move on? I guess it's not fair to ask you how I should feel, Im just asking how you think I should react and seem like Im being reasonable.

[GettinThere]

I don't know that you want to get serious with a girl that still has feelings (that she is actively hiding) for her ex. Maybe if you really had strong feelings for her, but it seems more that its just convenient...?

[BabyGirl]

Now, that changes things in my Book.. She has an Ex , she dated 3 years, now he's back in town, so you are on Hold, until he leaves, or even she Leaves with him.

Don't you deserve better Treatment than to be 2nd choice ? You've only dated a month and evidently she doesn't feel enough for you to..
1) Put you above an Ex
2) Be Honest and tell you she still has Feelings for the Ex.

You seem to be a Great Guy, one who doesn't just react with emotions that aren't thought out. You ask for Advise so you don't come off wrong or a Jerk.

Some things to think about.
A) When he leaves , will you be Second Best Again ?
B) Do you realize if you do Date her, she will be in Rebound and just using you to fill the Void of not having Him.
C) Don't you deserve a Relationship with a Woman that is Stable and Over any Ex's and Willing to Build a Relationship with you. ?

Me, I wouldn't be angry. I'd feel Lucky that you found out now instead of when you were more Involved with her. Don't text her again, If she does text you, text her back that you understand she is seeing her Ex, you hope she settles her problems with him and wish her the Best..

There are lots of women out there looking for a Nice Guy Though with the next Girl, try waiting awhile, a few weeks, before the Sex & Staying over night comes into play. That way you can test the Waters and find out if she has a Guy already, Just playing the field or also has an Ex Lurking in the Background.