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why do guys like the chase?

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  • why do guys like the chase?

    so long story short..
    i met this guy a bit over a month ago. i told him that i did not want a relationship and just wanted to have fun. we hung ou alot, we kissed, mucked around a but i did not sleep with him. he since we had our first date said he liked me and wanted me to be his girlfirend, i kept it very cool and was some what distant.. however the other day he asked me again if i would be his gf and i said yes but now that he has me things have changed..
    he took me to the movies yesterday and he was acting some what less interested. he was not as gentlemenly as he previously was , did not hold my hand as much and did not inciate conversation as much. he asked me to spend the night with him this weekend, it seems like the only thing he is keen for. when we came out of the cinemas he had a few missed calls and messages, maybe he has someone else? i really don't want to be played..
    i was talking to a mate, and he said that i am reading way too much into it and that if i don't sleep with him this weekend then he will loose interest..
    another thing, he would always text in the morning and ask what i am doing for the day, today nothing.

    my thoughts are right now to run, to not see him anymore, i don't want to be used or hurt. i feel like a trophy that he is trying to win. before i agreed to be his girlfriend i actually believed that he liked me but im not too sure anymore..

    anyway i guess i want guys perspective? .. could this all just be a game to him, just to see if he can get in my pants? oh btw i have only slept with one person, i was in a 4 year relationship with him.

    what should i do? advice would be very appreciated..
    thanks guys

    i am going all defensive and feel like pushy this guy away to prevent myself from becoming another notch on his belt..

  • Some guys are all about the chase, some women, too.

    If he loses interest about not sleeping with you shortly after becoming bf and gf, I would say: "see ya." He can chase getting sex just as well as pursuing you in the first place. Be warned, if he is really not a nice guy, he will revert to form when he has got all he wants.
    I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
    ...
    Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

    From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

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    • What JNS says. By 'holding back the goods' you prevented him from using you, good on you.

      NEVER let a man 'hold you to ransom' by putting a deadline on when you have to sleep with him by before he loses interest. I'm guessing you've just started dating again after the break up of this four year relationship? Well, you, young lady sound like you have a healthy level of self respect and have just worked out - all by yourself - exactly how to weed out the users and the times wasters. Your gut instincts were correct.
      "The greatest enemy will hide in the last place you will ever look" [I]Julius Caesar[/I]

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