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Is he just not that into me?

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  • Is he just not that into me?

    I haven't been on in a while please forgive me.

    I Have been casually seeing this guy a little over two months. When we are together he seems to be really into me. But that's the thing were almost never together. I invite him out all the time and either he can't make it or bails at the last minute. Most of the excuses seem legitimate but the frequency just seems over the top. It might just be early in the relationship and I shouldn't worry or it could just be sign that he's not really into me. I would hate to waste my time if that's the case. What do you girls think. I really don't want to end it but the constant disapointment is already wearing on me.
    He said he was going to come to Thanksgiving dinner with my family and after I told everyone he was coming he bailed because he said he didn't want to leave one of the soldiers under him alone for the day at the last minute. Again the reasons seem legitimate but this happens most of the time we have plans. And I am really annoyed now because its embarrassing. I haven't texted him back at this point because I don't think I can bring myself to say something nice.
    sigpic☮“I am convinced that the women of the world, united without any regard for national or racial dimensions, can become a most powerful force for international peace and brotherhood.”☮

  • Look what the cat dragged in

    I think if he is in charge of Soldiers they are his life, family and importance at present time.. I admire him for staying with that soldier.

    It's only been a few weeks. Women can "jump" into things full on sometimes whilst guys take a lot longer to bond and start to get emotionally attached. If I was you, I'd let him do this at his pace.. His job as I said would come first at present but given time, you will be an important part in his life, if you can have patience and understanding.

    The only time I would worry is if I felt I was being used, for either company or sex or both and that's it, that is all I am.. In which case, I'd nick off cause I'm worth more...

    Failing that, be patient and just let him come across as he can. It will make him respect you, understand you are not needy and allow him to slowly bond with you.




    • If he is not making any proactive effort to set up dates, I'd have to conclude he isn't that into you. Or, possibly, here really is just that busy and a relationship with you or anyone else isn't his priority. In which case, do you want to put your efforts there?


      • I've met several girls who've said they'll never, ever get involved with who are in the armed forces after having relationships with men who are in the forces. I think this is mainly because their careers will always come first (and all of the complications which come with this). This isn't to say a relationship with a 'squaddie' could never work, but the long list of complications can leave the odds stacked heavily against you. I know guy who was an officer in the navy who resigned as soon as he met his wife, I asked him why and he said "I always told myself that when I met the right woman I'd never put her through the rigors of being a military wife". They've been married about 30 years so far.
        No matter how objective we try to be, we all see through our own eyes...


        • OP, love the user name by the way :-)
          No matter how objective we try to be, we all see through our own eyes...



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