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  • crystal.mayer
    Junior Member
    • Feb 2013
    • 1

    Should I be concerned about this? Help!!

    My bf lost his virginity to me last night. He's 19 and I'm 23, he was saving it for marriage but decided to give it to me. We've been together for a year and a half. Afterward, he was freaking out!!. It was weird, and it sort of ruined the moment. He was saying things like "I feel dizzy", "You don't have anything like STDS right" (which is the dumbest question ever for that moment, we've done other sexual things before), he didn't want me to touch him, he didn't kiss me goodbye. It was the weirdest after sex ever. I didn't know what to do or how to react. I just tried my best to clam him down but he seemed so dazed. After he left he told me he was happy and he said I love you but I'm a little worried about why he acted that way. Guys usually don't really get that way about it. Sounds stupid but I wanted to make it special for him because I know it means something for him. I don't want him to regret it.
  • Harmony
    Veteran Member
    • Nov 2012
    • 311

    It sounds like your BF's hormones took over his head last night, which is a completely normal thing for a man. Losing your virginity is a big deal for most people, and that includes men too. While a man losing his virginity is (literally) less invasive it is for a woman it is probably (barring societies/cultures which ritualize the transition from childhood to adulthood) the biggest milestone for a young man growing up. I'm guessing it was pretty quick and clumsy, so he may have been a little embarrassed too.

    It sounds like it invoked a lot of emotion in him and he may not have expected things to go so far. If he is religious he may have felt some guilt.

    He'll most likely get a grip in the next 24 hours and be back wanting to do it again, so I wouldn't worry to much. Maybe text him something light hearted like, 'thanks for last night, when you've quit flapping I would rather like to do it again x'
    No matter how objective we try to be, we all see through our own eyes...

    Comment

    • rcoreyus
      Veteran Member
      • Sep 2007
      • 4369

      That's really strange. My impression was also that it didn't have the same sort of importance to most me that it does for women. For me (I'm male), it was very nice, but it wasn't especially important since I'd been sexually active in other ways before.

      Comment

      • CHANDLERS WISH
        • Mar 2008
        • 22440

        19 is a young age, 23 a woman..

        I think that it is fear, what a thing to say re STD, but I suspect due to your age, you both have talked regarding virginity.

        It probably was total shock he did it, he wanted to, but fear set in in all forms and shapes .

        Never think a male is cool totally. They have emotions and feelings, reasure him, he is important he has been the only one and he's a ****.. so to speak which I hope makes him laugh and please then make him feel the most important man in your life.

        No different than women losing their virginity..............It's an important thing for "anyone"
        PUT A LITTLE [B]'LIKE'[/B] IN MY SOUL!

        Comment

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