[sensational561]

I've been with my boyfriend for almost two years. We both have pasts involving the same addiction and were clean when we met, not knowing about each others past.
That might not even be relevant, other than that I can relate to his problems. But I also dated a kid for three years, dealing with the problems I now face again.
My boyfriend won 14000 playing poker last february. In the months following I seriously suspected drug use to the point where it became an almost daily discussion. He made me feel crazy every time I accused him, literally calling me mental. Six months later, his mom drug tests him and the drug showed up and my world just fell apart. How can you lie for six months??? Face to face, making ME feel like **** for ever thinking of it! But a part of me stayed, giving him another chance because he "loves me so much"
And everything seemed ok.
Five months later, he gets arrested with attempt to sell. He swears it was a one time thing to make money and that he wasnt using again. I drug tested him a week before getting arrested and he was fine...

But using or not, he keeps going behind my back.. the drug in general is a touchy subject for me, im proud of who I am now but not my past. And he keeps reminding me of it, and my ex. But he swears he loves me and now he has a lawyer trying to drop the charges...

Hes 23. Not some little kid.
I just dont want to be a fool, and allow it to keep happening. He already promised to change but here we are. When is it time to walk away? I love him but how do I know it wont happen again? Im out of ideas

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Congratulations and welcome to WH

It seems as you have both decided this was crap and moved on.

Well done.

It appears though he has an addictive personality, gambling and then thinks of money and how to make more and tries with what ever that drug was but is nieve and gets caught.

Firstly, it is OK to stuff up in life, how else do we learn?

Secondly you both appear to have done an amazing thing what someone needs if they fall a little is faith... If you love him stand tall, compliment him of all of his achievements and remind him of the situation if he was caught and of addictions but that you love him and are there for him and will work this together.

Then get him councelling on this..

If he works for it, then you know that you two are going to make it, if he changes, and stays on the addiction and does not get help...... You know that reason.

[Pollon]

The question is how much drama and disappointment do you really want in your life. You have kicked your addiction and should be very proud of that. By staying involved with someone still in the throws of his fight, you put your sobriety in jeopardy. Is it worth it?