However, i was out for my work christmas party 2 weeks ago and we ended up going to a local nightclub at the end of the night (after a good few too many drinks). I thought my boyfriend was there as i saw a few of his friends so I went to look for him. Needless to say he was not there but i bumped into my ex-boyfriend who i hadnt seen or spoke to in over 5 years (we last spoke a few months before i got with my current bf). He was really nice and gave me a big hug and we chatted for a bit before he had to go. And now 2 weeks later i cant stop thinking about him and how much i miss talking to him.
A bit of background about me and my ex. I met him when i was 17 and he was 25 through a mutual friend and we became good friends. I never felt attracted to him at all at first. A few months later things got a bit flirty and after a night out we ended up sleeping together (he was my first) and then became casual friends with benefits which led to a short relationship and back to friends with benefits as he was just out of a long term relationship and didnt want anything serious. I on the other hand was young, naive and completely head over heels about him so thought if i kept it going the way it was then surely he would soon feel the same. I was wrong and i ended the 'relationship' after a year and a half. We stayed in touch a bit as friends and it eventually fizzled out. He was a great guy and i always loved talking to him. When i got with my current bf though i completely forget about him and learned what real love felt like - but why cant i stop thinking about my ex now. I dont think its a sex thing as sex with my now OH is amazing and much better than what me and my ex had , i think i just miss the friendship and the fact that we cant be friends anymore.
Am i a bad person? Should i tell my bf whats going on in my head or should i leave it and see if my thoughts about my ex go away?
Help! i feel so bad and guilty constantly. Its eating me up! :-(
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