[Karla327]

Recently my bf of a year moved out. He is only 23 yrs old and our main problem is his immaturity. I'm 28 yrs old and ready to settle down. He is still attached to his mother by the umbilical cord b/c she does everything for him and has no responsibilities now that he is living back at home. He said he could not take me asking him to clean up after himself or do a simple chore such as unloading the dishwasher. I got to the point where I could not take it anymore, I was doing double the cleaning and work around the house. Now he has moved out. He is still in his "stay out til 4am and crash on some buddy's couch cuz he drank too much mentality". Says he doesn't want to rush back into putting a label on our relationship until things change for the better, yet he still wants to be exclusive which to me is a label. I know deep down that his immaturity is only going to continue to frustrate me but there is a part of me that loves him so much, I just can't 100% let go of him. I cannot imagine being with anyone else in my life, and I can't imagine him finding anyone else. My major question is do I wait around for him to grow up since I love him so much?

[WildChild]

Sounds like you are in love with what you think he could be rather than who he is. All you listed are points of immaturity, what is good about him and the relationship? Why do you want to stay? He needs to get out of the nest have to be completely responsible for himself for a couple of years. The two of you are in completely different places in life. The most loving thing you can do for him is to turn him loose. Find a man who's got it figured out and going someplace with his and see what the difference is!

[francine_pascal]

Don't you let him waste your time

Here here,

Immaturity at 23 is an inexcuseable willful act of selfishness -- I speak these words as someone who just broke off from a 26 year old man who was a tyrannical infant. He never hit or cursed, just sucked my energy for the years I was with him; he never grew, and never wanted to. On top of all of this, he cheated several times. Forget him forget him. This is not to say that you shouldn't date younger men, because there are some his age who are at a different developmental stage; and there are ones as old as sin who aren't a day above 12 in the brain. Just don't wait for this one, you'll only curse yourself for wasting your time.