[ChristinaAnn2008]

chris, you have to ask yourself, can you live this way?
you should leave now, as he said he isnt addicted, but thats what all addicts say. he has a child and he does this stuff almost in front of the child, actually when your there watching his child.
doesnt that show how much this has controlled his life ???????????????????????????

if he doesnt stop, you may even become an addict yourself. the child may become one? the child may find his stash and OD on this junk. you will have financial problems, always be lied to, possibly things will turn to other drugs and get some kind of disease... or yet, you come home and find him dead.
there are so many "CAN HAPPEN" things that it just = NO GOOD.

you can not stay just because of a child. i hate to say it, but this child is not yours and he is showing little responsability for his own child, how is he going to show responsability towards you and if you have a child with him one day?

he can change, but from what you wrote, he isn't going to.

your best move is to leave and tell his sister to care for his child. i am sure he is a good person, but i see no good from what you say. he lied to you already once and now you have to keep up on him. you shouldn't have to.

maybe if you leave he might actually see that you mean business and he realizes that someone cares for him and he may stop. but to be honest, those chances are slim.

your a good person who is careing, loving and more, i can tell from you asking this question. but sometimes that isnt enough if you dont get it back. if he cared he would seek the help he needs to kick this habbit and have a great life with you and his son.
the second thing he needs to do is change his friends if they do this and/or supply him with this junk.
and if it that hard he may need to move away from everyone.

you have to think hard as it is hard to leave someone you love and a child also. but this is going to get worse as he lied and keeps doing it.

As for me becoming an addict.. I would never do that in my life... no one could pay me to smoke this horrid drug.. I have a future and am soon graduating from college to become a certified Medical Assistant. And in no way am I paying 15,000 dollars to ruin and waste... but thank you for your kind words of wisdom.

[Tabatha S.]

test

Give him one chance.
Set up an appointment for a pee test, have him go and get tested.
Tell him that if he tests positive, you're gone like yesterday's news.
He won't be honest, but it's not him.... it's the drug.
He will steal from you, but it's not him... it's the drug.
Soon everything will revolve around the next fix, the next high....
He needs help. Offer it to him.
Don't let yourself become someone he uses.

[ChristinaAnn2008]

I talked to him again about it because he slipped up major.. so bad he was doing it in front of me... but the next day he threw away his pipe and showed me.. he admitted to having a problem... and he agreed to rehab... he said when he gets paid all he thinks about is the drug... he is going to give me his paychecks and I'm going hold onto it for him...


I know its like being his mommy but I don't want to give up on him and him get killed or locked up...

[Guest]

This is good Christina but make sure you stick to your guns and that he sticks to his otherwise he's just stalling!

[ChristinaAnn2008]

This is good Christina but make sure you stick to your guns and that he sticks to his otherwise he's just stalling!

Yeah thanks... Last time I was so ready to send him to jail.. I called a close officer of mine and everything but as I was telling him about the situation his sister was begging me not to only because of her nephew(his son)

[JLockhart]

I'm glad he can at least admit to himself and to you that he has a problem, although don't get me wrong, you are still facing an uphill battle. Hopefully he can get into some form of rehab where they can give him the tools he will need to overcome his cravings.

Jail is not a good thing and it would jeopardize the custody of his son, but if it helps him wake up and quit and / or forces him to go to rehab, it would be a good thing in the long run. If he doesn't stop using, he will end up in jail anyway.

[sourpuss]

I agree with In Need. It's good that you are helping, but you need to decide right now what your limit is, otherwise it will drag on forever. Are you holding him to this, this final time? Or is he allowed to slip-up a couple more times. Once you've made your decision about how much you're willing to put up with you need to let him know what the boundaries are and be 100% certain that you are going to stick to your guns.

If you give an altamatium (sp?) you have to be 100% sure that you can follow through. Once you don't follow through, all credibility is lost and you become a doormat.

[Guest]

Once you don't follow through, all credibility is lost and you become a doormat.

Very well put, Example.........When I was in this shape many yrs. ago my Father tho't was doing me a favor by bailing me out of jail..(that was his way of loving me) but once he decided he wasn't going to bail me out anymore, I had to lay in the bed I had made. When I got out, that's when I cleaned up.

And it's goes the same for kids, if one tells them to do something or else and they don't, and one don't do what one says, then they pick up you are bluffing.....Hence, Doormat!!

[Joy]

Sunday night ( Jan 18,2009) there was a special on A&E dedicated to Meth... its become so wide spread and such a horrible drug cause it is sucha dirty high with dirty ingredients.

I agree with setting a limit as to how much you will invest into this relationship. Go on the A&E website you can probably watch the special intervention. It may give you some insight on helping yourself in this situation , your BF and his son.

if he is playing so dangerously with his own life how is protecting yours or his sons? He needs help and i hope he decides to get it. It doesn't matter how much you want it ... he has to want it. You can report this childs case and you can take protective custody of this child or another member of this mans family.

My heart goes out to you and his son...

[ChristinaAnn2008]

My final limit is next time I catch him with drugs or know he is on it.. I'm first telling his mother.. she told him if he has it in her house he has 24 hours to pack his bags... but I'm sure there will be a next time... so when that happens I'm just going to leave... I'm graduating college in a month and can sure as find a respectful guy... the main thing that kept me holding on was his son.. and I'll never part from his son.. I'm pretty much sisters with his sister so I'll hang out when he isn't home so I can still be there for his son.