tangled up in blue
Well I unexpectedly weaved a web of my own recently. I have been single for about 9 months now (longer than my last relationship) and since I rarely see another human during my work days and know better than to search the bar for men I did some craigslist perusing and found a guy just my style. When we first chatted I was amazed at how much we have in common. I am unconventional to say the least so it's cool when I find someone with my same interests.
The same day we ( i'll call him AL) started writing I went out with a friend to a dance party (on valentiines nonetheless) and met a total cutie (i'll call tad) who ended up coming home with me.
Tad and I have seen each other about 8 times over the past 2 1/2 weeks with 4 more over night stays his place and mine. Normally I would be excited to see where this is going but he has just gotten out of a 3 year relationship only 1 week before I met him so I have alwys kept that in mind.
I continued to talk to AL on the phone because I think he's so freakin special it's rediculous. The only problem is (he's moving back to his hometown which is where I live- not the problem) he had to set back his return date another month and I have yet to meet him in person.
Back to Tad. We've recently talked about our feelings and I told him i was aware that i as a rebound and that I was okay with that. I told him about Al and that Al will be out in a month or so and maybe he was a ....prebound?
I haven't been able to tell Al b/c I don't want him to see me as a premiscuous gal ( he's only had 1 ever girlfriend) and I think it may end things...we've grown pretty close in a few weeks sharing everything with each other over phone calls and texting all day. So I feel I need to come clean to Al but if I do I risk losing him when this thing with Tad could turn out to be very short term and I'm not really cheating.
Now if it isn't confusing enough I am having a very hard time keeping control over my feelings for Tad. What I do know of him is fascinating ( his work, his adventurous spirit, his morals etc...) we keep coming up with all of these fun things we should do together, and the sex is AMAZING (seriously the best I've ever had- ( the first time we climaxed it was silumtaneously) . He's very passioinate and we hold each other and talk all night and every time we've stayed together we have spent almost half of the next day in bed ( we both have flexible working hours) He's so devilishly cute, smart, and funny I find him completely irrestistable. I think he's falling for me too but since we allready have this agreement we've created a block in our emotional communication. Am I wrong in assuming that he's feeling the same way? I am afraid that he hasn't had time to deal with emotions form his ex and isn't ready for anythings serious. I am 25 and starting to look for a husband. Should I cut things off with Al and hope for the best with Tad or visa-versa? I am so confused and can't believe all of this has happened in the time span of a few weeks....before that my love life was completely non-existent.
Am I a bad person for dating two guys at once? How can I put a leash on my emotions. I'm afraid it will all turn out badly but I don't know what steps to take next. Please help!
The same day we ( i'll call him AL) started writing I went out with a friend to a dance party (on valentiines nonetheless) and met a total cutie (i'll call tad) who ended up coming home with me.
Tad and I have seen each other about 8 times over the past 2 1/2 weeks with 4 more over night stays his place and mine. Normally I would be excited to see where this is going but he has just gotten out of a 3 year relationship only 1 week before I met him so I have alwys kept that in mind.
I continued to talk to AL on the phone because I think he's so freakin special it's rediculous. The only problem is (he's moving back to his hometown which is where I live- not the problem) he had to set back his return date another month and I have yet to meet him in person.
Back to Tad. We've recently talked about our feelings and I told him i was aware that i as a rebound and that I was okay with that. I told him about Al and that Al will be out in a month or so and maybe he was a ....prebound?
I haven't been able to tell Al b/c I don't want him to see me as a premiscuous gal ( he's only had 1 ever girlfriend) and I think it may end things...we've grown pretty close in a few weeks sharing everything with each other over phone calls and texting all day. So I feel I need to come clean to Al but if I do I risk losing him when this thing with Tad could turn out to be very short term and I'm not really cheating.
Now if it isn't confusing enough I am having a very hard time keeping control over my feelings for Tad. What I do know of him is fascinating ( his work, his adventurous spirit, his morals etc...) we keep coming up with all of these fun things we should do together, and the sex is AMAZING (seriously the best I've ever had- ( the first time we climaxed it was silumtaneously) . He's very passioinate and we hold each other and talk all night and every time we've stayed together we have spent almost half of the next day in bed ( we both have flexible working hours) He's so devilishly cute, smart, and funny I find him completely irrestistable. I think he's falling for me too but since we allready have this agreement we've created a block in our emotional communication. Am I wrong in assuming that he's feeling the same way? I am afraid that he hasn't had time to deal with emotions form his ex and isn't ready for anythings serious. I am 25 and starting to look for a husband. Should I cut things off with Al and hope for the best with Tad or visa-versa? I am so confused and can't believe all of this has happened in the time span of a few weeks....before that my love life was completely non-existent.
Am I a bad person for dating two guys at once? How can I put a leash on my emotions. I'm afraid it will all turn out badly but I don't know what steps to take next. Please help!
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