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  • moya
    Junior Member
    • Sep 2009
    • 6

    is this cheating

    me and my boy friend a a fight and we broke up for about 4 days during this time he had sex with his ex then we got back together is this cheating i didn't argue over it but i feel upset i appreciated that he told mi the same day we got back together but i don't know where to go from here
  • LanaBear
    Veteran Member
    • Jul 2009
    • 8373

    Technically, I would say no. You two were broken up. Does it suck? Absolutely. But you knew your were broken up, he knew you were broken up. If you did the same, would you feel you cheated on him?

    Comment

    • Kallygirlie
      Veteran Member
      • Jun 2009
      • 421

      hun, if you and your boyfriend where broken up then who ever he sleeps with is nobodies business but his and who he had sex with. It honorable that he told you when you first got back together, he didn not have to do this but it shows he respects you. When people break up, we dont know if we'll get back together. Now we dont know who broke up with who and what the reasons were but i would not consider this cheating

      now if he ended it with you, slept with her then asked you back, then still this isn't cheating but its really is low on his part. but like I said we dont have the full story so all i can go by is you were broken up, so him having sex with his ex would not be considered cheating
      Krystal

      Comment

      • stressed
        Veteran Member
        • Jun 2009
        • 1914

        He slept with his ex within 4 days of a break up and it's not cheating? Are you kidding? 4 days?!! I don't know, I wouldn't like this one bit. Seems like his ex must be quite available and willing and he can still contact her at any point. You don't say much about how long you've been together or how he is as a boyfriend, but from what I can imagine this relationship can't last too long. If he runs to his ex as soon as a huge serious issue comes up then he won't be able to handle worse issues than a break up in his life. Also, this isn't something you are going to forget, it's going to stay with you.

        Comment

        • mr.mansview
          Veteran Member
          • Aug 2007
          • 1173

          have to agree with "stressed" on this one..he certainly didn't sit around moping did he..how is telling the gf showing respect for her? he doesn't even have respect for himself..the next time there is a spat and the bf walks out the door is any woman now fair game for him or does there have to be an "offical declaration of seperation"?..sounds like he's in a no lose situation with these rules
          a smart man learns from his mistakes..a wise man learns from the mistakes of others..

          Comment

          • happy ending
            Veteran Member
            • Oct 2008
            • 869

            ok technically not, but that is totally skank, it sounds as if she is waiting in the wings. how long have you been together, how comitted are you both?

            Comment

            • CHANDLERS WISH
              • Mar 2008
              • 22440

              I'm sorry I have to agree with Happy ending ( haha nearly wrote happy one? ) anyways.

              Why does a guy go back to his ex?

              Familiarity?

              Because they have been communicating?

              Comfort?

              What has she been doing in order to gain his attention, in order for him to sleep with her?

              CW
              PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

              Comment

              • moya
                Junior Member
                • Sep 2009
                • 6

                ok well the broke up nine mouths ago while we jus met and became fren while we were still frenz she told him she wanted him back i don't kno wat him reaction as this was none of my business wen we got together it was jus a mouth before we broke of he as very high morals we broke over me using cruse words as some woman in a bus he was there and says that showed i had no respect 4 him so we broke up he was calling 2 days later i didn't answer so he call her note we weren't sexually active jus kissing and touching he called they met a wen to her house we were talking it out then we ad sex for the first time thats wen he told me

                Comment

                • LanaBear
                  Veteran Member
                  • Jul 2009
                  • 8373

                  Originally posted by moya
                  he as very high morals we broke over me using cruse words as some woman in a bus he was there and says that showed i had no respect 4 him
                  Hold up here for just a second. Although I agree with the it wasn't cheating idea and happy endings that it was a totally skank thing to do, isn't he just a tad hypocritical? He has HIGH morals and broke up with you over using a cuss word, but then goes and does the dirty with an ex immediately after breaking up with you...

                  My thoughts - he wanted a little more action than he was getting from you... used some lame excuse about morals and cussing to get a break to go have sex with the ex...

                  Comment

                  • GlitterAndStuds
                    Veteran Member
                    • Jul 2009
                    • 1182

                    Originally posted by LanaBear
                    Hold up here for just a second. Although I agree with the it wasn't cheating idea and happy endings that it was a totally skank thing to do, isn't he just a tad hypocritical? He has HIGH morals and broke up with you over using a cuss word, but then goes and does the dirty with an ex immediately after breaking up with you...

                    My thoughts - he wanted a little more action than he was getting from you... used some lame excuse about morals and cussing to get a break to go have sex with the ex...
                    Took the words right out of my mouth with this one. It's definitely hypocritical...a little TOO much so, if you ask me. There is/was definitely something else going on with him that he's not mentioning. It seems odd to me that he used something as dumb as "cuss words" as an excuse to break up with you (I mean really, who does that?)...actually does break up with you for a few days...then immediately has sex with his ex. So she was just conveniently around right after you broke up? Seems sketchy to me. And the fact that he went back to you right after makes it even sketchier.

                    Comment

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