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  • GlitterAndStuds
    Veteran Member
    • Jul 2009
    • 1182

    Haha oooh Tex.... that made me smile, well done

    You do have a point there

    Comment

    • Texinator
      Veteran Member
      • Sep 2009
      • 5556

      He's got an awesome relationship with an awesome girlfriend. From the way you've been describing him, it sounds like he's smart enough to know better than to mess up a good thing like that.

      Comment

      • GlitterAndStuds
        Veteran Member
        • Jul 2009
        • 1182

        Oh yeah, he's a peach. Haha. I just don't like other people stepping on my territory

        Like I said, I do trust him with everything and don't think he would ever do that. Because let's face it, how good can a relationship be if I DID think that?

        I know I'm being really silly in that sense. It's just that I'm a chick. Therefore I know how chicks operate, and I'm getting a fishy smell from this one.

        Comment

        • Texinator
          Veteran Member
          • Sep 2009
          • 5556

          Even if she really got it into her head that she needed to try to steal him from you.. Really, what's the worst thing that could happen? She can't do anything if Adam's not willing to play along. She'd be nothing more than a fly in a house, annoying but she wouldn't be able to change Adam's relationship with you.

          If he were to work at that pet store, to whom would he come home after work? To you, not her, and there's nothing she can do to change it.

          Comment

          • Ashlee T.
            Veteran Member
            • Dec 2008
            • 6412

            Ahh, well the details do help. Sounds like you haven't a thing to worry about. Now if he was ONLY applying to that store, I'd be a little suspicious. Otherwise, just like Tex said, whats the worst that can happen? If he's not willing, then she leaves with her tail tucked. Can you trust her? No. Can't trust most random people.......but based on what you've said, you DO trust him....so what she does or does not do shouldn't matter.

            Meet her, break the ice, and don't make a big deal of her to him. If you make a big deal of her he'll wonder why you feel threatened, and then like others have said, it will affect how you act to him and how he sees you. Jealousy is unattractive. Strong intuition and confidence IS attractive.

            It's quite possible that you feel disrespected by her, even though maybe she doesn't see herself as doing anything wrong, and perhaps you've produced this whole entire SOAP OPERA in your head of what a sl*tty villian she is out to get your man........... when in fact, if you'd just open yourself up, meet her, and break that ice, you may see something totally different. AND it will do you so much good to rid of those negative feelings you've been carrying. They'll drag you down.

            Now....if you start to question his trustability (is that a word?) deep down in your gut.......well then that's a whole new issue. But it doesn't sound like that's the case.
            "Be what you're looking for."

            Comment

            • GlitterAndStuds
              Veteran Member
              • Jul 2009
              • 1182

              BD you're so smart You hit the nail right on the head when you said that I probably feel disrespected. That IS what it is, I just didn't think to mention it amidst all my mumbo jumbo.

              The reason I feel that way is because she does know I exist and that he has a girlfriend, who he lives with. She asks about me from time to time, just asking if he still lives with me. It's very possible that I'm playing this up in my head because girls tend to screw me over ALL the time. And yes, her being random does add to it.

              I know I keep saying the same things over and over again, but it's helping me sort through my feelings by talking it out AND hearing what you guys have to say. It's very rare that I start to lose my cool to this point, so when I do, I need to make sure to stop it. Haha

              Comment

              • Texinator
                Veteran Member
                • Sep 2009
                • 5556

                You know what's a great way to off people that disrespect you? Just smile.

                ****es them off because it makes them realize they're not significant enough to have power over you. If you gave her some sign that she's getting into your head, she'd be happy because she'd feel important. So don't give her that satisfaction.

                Comment

                • Hopeless Dork
                  Veteran Member
                  • Dec 2008
                  • 4255

                  That comment you made to him "of course it had to be that one"... while light hearted and he knew it as such is the tip of the iceburg of little insecurities that slip from your mouth here and there if he takes this job and you haven't told him how you feel. While you know its not right to be worried about it and deep down know you have nothing to worry about... not telling him how you feel will rear its ugly head in other ways.

                  Other things will make you mad that normally wouldn't because you are supressing saying whats truly in your heart. Keep it light hearted when you talk to him, let him know you KNOW... you have nothing to worry about , because that is true... just voice your fears, and be true to your heart with what you tell him...

                  Give him the opportunity to comfort you and give you that reassurance that if he does take the job, she will not be a factor for future worries. Let him know you support him and want him to do whats best for him, what makes you uncomfortable and let him laugh it off, hug you and make you feel better about all of it.

                  Once off your chest, your spirit will be light again and you will be much more equip to handle his decision whatever it is and be behind him this way or that way
                  Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

                  Comment

                  • GlitterAndStuds
                    Veteran Member
                    • Jul 2009
                    • 1182

                    Originally posted by Tex
                    You know what's a great way to off people that disrespect you? Just smile.

                    ****es them off because it makes them realize they're not significant enough to have power over you. If you gave her some sign that she's getting into your head, she'd be happy because she'd feel important. So don't give her that satisfaction.
                    I do try to do that when I can. It kind of goes hand in hand with "Living well is the best revenge" sort of thing. Something that I don't go a day without telling myself, at least for the past few months.

                    It's really all I can do to make the best out of a sticky situation, huh?

                    Comment

                    • GlitterAndStuds
                      Veteran Member
                      • Jul 2009
                      • 1182

                      Originally posted by Hopeless Dork
                      That comment you made to him "of course it had to be that one"... while light hearted and he knew it as such is the tip of the iceburg of little insecurities that slip from your mouth here and there if he takes this job and you haven't told him how you feel. While you know its not right to be worried about it and deep down know you have nothing to worry about... not telling him how you feel will rear its ugly head in other ways.

                      Other things will make you mad that normally wouldn't because you are supressing saying whats truly in your heart. Keep it light hearted when you talk to him, let him know you KNOW... you have nothing to worry about , because that is true... just voice your fears, and be true to your heart with what you tell him...

                      Give him the opportunity to comfort you and give you that reassurance that if he does take the job, she will not be a factor for future worries. Let him know you support him and want him to do whats best for him, what makes you uncomfortable and let him laugh it off, hug you and make you feel better about all of it.

                      Once off your chest, your spirit will be light again and you will be much more equip to handle his decision whatever it is and be behind him this way or that way
                      I'm glad you caught that. He didn't say anything about that comment, but I immediately felt like an *** for saying it. I don't think he took it seriously, but I really almost felt compelled to apologize for being assy.

                      He knows how I feel about her, and I'm sure I'll be telling him again. I've never made a production out of it and have always approached it lightly. I guess I just hate to mention it because I'm always afraid that no matter how I go around it, it's going to sound to him like he's the one I don't trust. Which is the complete opposite of the truth.

                      Last time it came up, he did exactly what you said. He gave me a little eye roll like I was being silly, told me I have nothing to worry about, etc. He doesn't think she sees him that way at all, but I've also heard that many guys can't pick up on things like that, while girls get that intuition. I could be wrong though. It could be just the opposite, and he could be right.

                      Comment

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