[pretzel]

"The trick is to mature, rather than age."

Darn I wish I would have said that. There are no truer words spoken than that.

Analogy concerning Betty White. My dad's 85 (will be 86 next month), he still goes down to Florida a couple of times a year to play golf with my brother. He's still active in the local fraternal organization my family's been involved with for over 60 years. He and my brothers just finished remodeling their bathroom and hallways. The only thing slowing him down is his knees, they need replaced.

I only hope I can be as active as him when I get his age.

[SinisterUrge]

It's tough to try and make someone feel better about themselves when they see that their youthful looks are starting to fade a bit...

Yes, people like to get stuck on their "youthfulness" and forget that older people still have looks in them. My grandfather said that "All any man needs in his life to look good is a new suit and a haircut". I'd personally ad his car to that list (Driving a Mustang in highschool = You are the man. Not so much when you're 40. Maybe time to test drive something with a little gravitas, like a CTS or a 3-series).

[WildChild]

Sorry, maybe I didn't clarify myself! Let me try to explain better with the Betty White example...

When I said she acted like a 20-something, I didn't mean the immaturity aspect of that age.. I was more refering to the bubbliness, and her quip.

Sure she has been a vibrant actress for 30 plus years. I guess she's most known for her work with the Mary Tyler Moore show and of course Golden Girls. She's done many great things, won emmys.. but after Golden Girls, she really did not have an active career. Now you are seeing her everywhere - she's become a pop icon to an entirely new generation. She's just received her SAG award, she's in the works to host SNL, she costarred in a blockbuster film, she's white-hot again (pun intended) at the age of 88.

And do people thing "OMG what is that old lady doing being on TV, when most young actresses are cast aside by age 35?" No, they love her attitude, they love her personality, they love that she's cheeky and fun, and so not what a stereotypical 88 year old woman is. And that is her appeal!

That is what I was trying to get at with my comment... that her personality shines so brightly that no one cares or even really notices that she is 88 years old.

LOL But consider, part of the reason she shines so brightly is because is IS 88.
She is comfortable with who she is. She shows no need to try to look, say 60 (that would be 28 years younger) and certainly isn't running around in knee high boots and a mini skirt (I've seen 70 yr olds do that). I think people respond to her vitality and to her acceptance and comfort with herself. I doubt very much that she looks in the mirror and worries that some man will think her boobs sag too much, or that he would leave if she doesn't swallow.
I think she is fabulous and I'm glad you mentioned her. Hollywood invests far too much in the young and skinny with impossible boobs or muscles (depending on the gender)doing ridiculous things. Over half the population of the industrial world is over 40 and its time we started acting like grown ups and quit trying to emulate the teens and 20 somethings - we're supposed to be setting the example, leading the way (not in plastic surgery, I was thinking more of positive action). I guess you are all capable of casting a critical eye and figuring out who are the examples of what not to do - you've got plenty to choose from!

[WildChild]

"The trick is to mature, rather than age."

Darn I wish I would have said that. There are no truer words spoken than that.

Analogy concerning Betty White. My dad's 85 (will be 86 next month), he still goes down to Florida a couple of times a year to play golf with my brother. He's still active in the local fraternal organization my family's been involved with for over 60 years. He and my brothers just finished remodeling their bathroom and hallways. The only thing slowing him down is his knees, they need replaced.

I only hope I can be as active as him when I get his age.

My parents are in their mid 70s with no health issues, they are all over the country and when budget permits - the world.
The current insurance company cavet is that if you make it to 50 with no significant health concerns - you'll live to 100.

Quality of life is more important than longevity. I don't want to spend 20 or 30 years with essentially a half life. Managing apartments, I have tenants who have exactly that. They are alone, rarely go out or do anything, have no interests that I've noticed, they eat, sleep, watch TV. Who knows? Maybe with the inclusion of going to work, thats all they've done most of their lives. They are boring and really kind of pathetic, although they are all nice. On the other hand I have an 80 yr old who carries his bikes up and down the stairs from the 3rd floor daily and bikes 30 or 40 miles, sometimes more, he literally stops to smell the flowers. He is a delight to talk with. Another, a 60+ lady who does all kinds of volunteer work, takes several classes, belly dances, is always finding some new thing to do -she got me folk dancing last summer, is another who is just fun to be around.

Attitude is huge.

[KMonte85]

I doubt very much that she looks in the mirror and worries that some man will think her boobs sag too much, or that he would leave if she doesn't swallow.

Hollywood invests far too much in the young and skinny with impossible boobs or muscles (depending on the gender)doing ridiculous things. Over half the population of the industrial world is over 40 and its time we started acting like grown ups and quit trying to emulate the teens and 20 somethings - we're supposed to be setting the example, leading the way (not in plastic surgery, I was thinking more of positive action).

I think this brings a great light to why age becomes such an issue. All we are used to seeing are men and women, grasping to what may be left of youth. We need to focus not on our crows feet, and smile lines. But be happy that we smiled, and can keep smiling, and can keep making an influence in the world with gray or receeding hair.

I wish hollywood would embrace this... I wish everyone would embrass this. I look at my parents who are both senior citizens. They LOVE it and would go back to being "young again" for anything, except perhaps the better health at that age. That's the mentality we need.

Young looks do not equal happiness or a fulfilling life. Those who are happy, vibrant, full of life, and comfortable with themselves are much more attractive to others than those that are aging quite UNGRACEFULLY (surgeries, dye jobs, botox, etc...).

[rcoreyus]

Late 20s, the horror...the horrror.... <g>. Wait until you are 50 and see how funny that is. <g>>

In general if you love someone, you won't care about them ageing.

BTW: any questions of the "am I looking older", or "does this dress make me look fat" are unfair, and should never be asked.

[kygirl]

Late 20s, the horror...the horrror.... <g>. Wait until you are 50 and see how funny that is. <g>>

In general if you love someone, you won't care about them ageing.

BTW: any questions of the "am I looking older", or "does this dress make me look fat" are unfair, and should never be asked.

ha ha don't get me wrong. I don't think I'm old I just realize what people mean that you start to look back on certain things and think "why didn't I appreciate it more" I'm sure that will continue a bit although I'm trying to just appreciate it more now

[rcoreyus]

Definitely enjoy what you have. There are advantages to ageing - maturity, experience, knowledge, generally more wealth. When you are older you will tend to look back and your younger self and wish you had had more of those things. But you will also regret losing your youth, energy, beauty, health.

When I was young, I would have given almost anything to have what I have now. Now I'd give almost anything to have what I had then.

ha ha don't get me wrong. I don't think I'm old I just realize what people mean that you start to look back on certain things and think "why didn't I appreciate it more" I'm sure that will continue a bit although I'm trying to just appreciate it more now

[WildChild]

When I was young, I would have given almost anything to have what I have now. Now I'd give almost anything to have what I had then.

It's that classic, I'd love to be 21 again IF I could know what I know now.