[MaryLouise]

so this year it will be 5 years with me being with my boyfriend..we live together and have a 2 year old son together, we have of course our ups and downs like every couple...we were engaged but I broke it off...we were fighting way to much... Now there is this other guy, who lets be honest I have been in love with this man since the first time i saw him, he is a really good friend, my best friend actually, and i have known him for over 6 years, so i knew him before i met my bf..well last year i dont know why but he confessed his feelings for me and he says he's in love with me ( and i feel that way too) im so confused..i mean i know how it is not to have my dad around, i dont want that for my son who is the main factor in this whole thing..i havent been happy with my bf for a really long time, we were about to break up but then i found out i was pregnate so we decided to stay together for my son, my bf never helps me with anything with my son, to me i should have just stayed single cause im like a single mom...im just so confused with everything...now everytime i tell him i want a break, he acts like the perfect bf for a couple months and then its back to his old self, never home ..and never helping me with anything. and with the other guy he gets in these moods where he says he doesnt want to talk to me cause he cant handle me being with my bf and not him...then a couple weeks go by and he's calling me...im just so confused what should i do?? wait and see if my bf will become a better man or leave him and try to have a relationship with the other guy...confused

[sourpuss]

Have you and your boyfriend tried counseling? I only say that because there is a child involved, you have to put the kid first. What do you mean he never helps? Does he work? Is he a good dad to his son, do they spend time together, etc.? Does your boyfriend know how you feel?

[MaryLouise]

no we have never tried counseling, ive asked and he wont..and what i mean he never helps is he never gives our son a bath or help make his meals or change him or even watch him...yea he works and im a stay at home mom but that is too a job also..i used to work but had to give my job up this past feb cause i have cronic lyme disease...he knows how i feel beleave me im not shy about that...he does spend some time with my son...but then it seems he always has to do something for work or a friend or family..me and my son always comes last...and when his friends are here and make a mess he exspects me to clean up after them and if i dont then it wont get done...it just gets old..im 25 and feel like im 60..

[missbrandi]

I feel like you may need to just do a seperation from him for a minute to really think things through on your own. He is not standing up and being the real man to you and your son like he should. Just because you pay a bill there is way more that he should be doing for you and your son. You two shouldn't come last to him, you are his Family now and yalls needs should come first always.

[sourpuss]

Do you have the means to get your own place for a few months? Maybe if you were gone, even if it was just to live with a friend or family member, he would see what he has to lose.
Don't make it about the other guy, make it about you and your son.