[Guest]

I have a fake facebook account. And I watch my ex- husbands' profile. When I search for him on facebook, I can't find him- he is blocked. So I became friends with his girl friend with my fake profile. BEing facebook friends with her allows me to see his profile! I feel addicted, just like I am addicted to the internet. It kills me to see pictures of her and him when I look at their profiles. I have been divorced 4 years, am not dating anyone, feel alone.

[Hopeless Dork]

Trixies, this is so unhealthy. Its obsession, and technically... its stalking. 4 years is a long time. It sounds like he's moved on with his life and you are creating alter ego's to be connected, even if only to cause yourself misery and pain. Therapy is CRUCIAL. I really think you need some counseling... this sounds like depression, and a very very unhealthy fixation with the past.

You loved him, but somewhere along the line you have to learn to close that chapter in your life, take those memories and put them in a shelf to dust off and look at from time to time as you remember your life... but not to focus on them on a daily basis.

You need to turn to friends and family for support, you need a hobby and to develop some interests and to get out there and be social. You need to delete that fake facebook account and stay off there on your other one... for a good long while until you gain some distance and perspective.

I am very sorry for what you are going through, all the lonliness and hurt -- but you see, this wont make that better. You're just going to keep sinking into a deeper and deeper hole. Please turn to some friends, please talk to someone.

[LanaBear]

I agree with HD. This is so unhealthy and really obsessive. You need to stop! Get into counseling and move on with your life. You can't move on until you let go, it's been 4 years, it's time.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Trixies the ladies are right.

Often we do things that we would normally not do, out of lonliness.

You can't go on this way, your putting even more negativity into your life...

Don't you believe that you are worth it? That you too can have someone beautiful again in your life? YOU CAN.....

Isn't it time therefore, to start living instead of getting addicted to sitting behind a computer, in a fake world, and get out into the real world?

It's time...

Time to realise your own self worth and start living, doing things you love, getting out there, get a hair cut, die it, start living sweet and you'll soon realise that you've just wasted 4 years of your life ...

What is good, is that you wrote that. That means that you realise it. And, in that, you just may be able to take the next step.

TAKE IT.

CW

[JadedQueen]

What you are doing is very unhealthy.
What you need to do is find things that interest you and stop dwelling on being lonely and stop obsessing over your ex and his new girlfriend. Whenever you find yourself wanting to check up on him remind yourself why you are no longer together. Would you be obsessing like this if you were in a relationship? Have you been in a relationship since you and your ex split up? You have been split up for 4 years..... he's apparently moved on, it's time for you to follow suit and move on also. Stop torturing yourself and shut down your facebook account, stop searching for him, no good can come from it.

[rcoreyus]

I can see how it would be fascinating, but imagine if he were doing that to you (maybe he is?). Its an invasion of privacy and as others have pointed out might be illegal. Almost everything you do on the web is tracked, so if he finds out he would be able to prove it.