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  • WildChild
    Banned
    • Sep 2008
    • 14142

    Sounds like it is time for you to just let it go.

    Comment

    • ricky85
      Junior Member
      • Jul 2010
      • 8

      I know, either way I'm close to getting the closure I'm looking for.

      Comment

      • kira
        Veteran Member
        • Feb 2008
        • 986

        What are you looking for? It's obviously done and over with. I've gotten so many emails, calls, texts, whatever from ex boyfriends looking for "closure" and they never find what they want. No matter how many times I repeat how badly things went or how much and long I debated things before breaking up with them they still keep asking. I usually end up blocking them or ignoring them eventually. Even after being married I've got my last boyfriend sending messages fairly frequently and my first boyfriend from years ago finds a new way to contact me every now and then. It's seriously annoying.

        Comment

        • ricky85
          Junior Member
          • Jul 2010
          • 8

          I certainly wasn't annoying her. We have had zero contact in three weeks. My letter wasn't a plea to get back together, or telling her how much I miss her.

          The letter hurt at first, but when I read it over again it occurred to me what she was doing. She cared very deeply for me just weeks ago, she always put a lot of effort into the relationship. A week after the break we had a nasty email exchange, I said some pretty hurtful things. That was our last contact.

          My email was an offering to end on good terms; I was feeling good when I sent it. She responded by saying there is still resentment, made some snide remarks about me. Yet, at the same time her life seems to be going not just well, but really well. If an ex I broke up with were to send me a benign email like mine while my life was going that well I certainly would not have responded like that.

          Anyway, I still care about her, and I’m sure there will always be a place in my heart for her. I have some regrets but I think that was what I needed to truly move on.
          Thanks for everyone’s input.

          Comment

          • Mes T
            Veteran Member
            • Oct 2009
            • 2678

            So early in the break-up, I wouldn't analyze anything said in an email. I didn't get that her life was wonderful, I just got that she was making an effort to move on.

            As hard as it might be, I'd give it another 6 months before contacting again.

            Comment

            • ricky85
              Junior Member
              • Jul 2010
              • 8

              Yeah maybe, maybe not. I'm trying not to over-analyze things. My last thought seems to make the most sense, given all of the parameters of the relationship. She seemed to be doing well in a lot of areas, yet is still quite mad at me. She broke up with me via a text. (I didn't do anything like cheat either, her then still being ****ed would be justified)
              If I broke up with a girl as coldly, and disrespectful as that, and I was doing 'really well', I certainly wouldn't still be upset with her, and make remarks about how I never should have dated her after she sent a friendly email a month later.

              Knowing she still has feelings for me, albeit bad ones lets me know I wasn't alone, and it hasn't been easy for her either.
              No response, block or a simple email would have been worse to deal with.

              Comment

              • Calicorado83
                Veteran Member
                • Apr 2009
                • 224

                Yes, it took me 8 full months (I counted them) just to get over a 6 month relationship. I spoke to him within that time, but wasn't comfortable actually being around him without wanting him until time had passed and my hear had healed.

                Comment

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