[m.hendry]

Hey, my ex broke up with me about 3 weeks ago, however i havent seen him in person for around 5 now. We broke up because we constantly argued, He can't imagine a future with me and he wants to persue a music career and so wants the freedom to travel and get somewhere. He has now been accepted into the Brighton Institute of Modern Music in England and we are from Scotland so him going away, a relationship wouldnt really work.

We are planning to meet up sometime soon and i'm not sure what to say and how to act, what to do and what to not do, so any advice you guys can give me would be great. Thank you x

[sungoddesschelsy]

why are you meeting up again?

[m.hendry]

Because we wish to stay friends, im friends with most of my ex's. We had such a good friendship before and it would be such a waste to not try and revive it again, in my opinion. And i want to be able to spend some time with him before he leaves for college.

[sungoddesschelsy]

So if you are going to be friends then you shouldn't worry about what you say or don't say because friends don't do that to each other. Maybe I'm not reading into this correctly but sounds like you still want to be more than friends

But if it were me... it maybe be to soon to turn a bf/gf relationship into a natural friendship again that soon.

[m.hendry]

Of course i'd love to be together with him again, but thats not what he wants and i respect that, and i wouldnt want to stand in the way of him persuing his dreams. I just mean i dont know how to maybe handle any awkward silences that may happen, i dont know wether to give him a big hug when i see him or not. That kind of stuff.

[sungoddesschelsy]

listen and learn for the first 10-20 minutes... pay attention to his body language and what its telling you. if he goes for a hug then hug him... if he doesn't then softly smile and start the conversation. I'm big on listening to your own intuition and watching others body language/facial expressions...

if nothing else just listen to him and let him know how much you still care for him. this way while he's gone he'll know there is one girl back home that truely cares.

[BabyGirl]

You say you are going to " meet up " sometime soon.


Since he's moving away and has told you he can't imagine a future with you and is persuing a career in another country.

He has been honest and hopefully, gently, told you you are a Friend Only. It seems he does care about you in a friendship way. But wants to still have your support in his choice of furthering his dreams in life.

So throw him a little "Going Away Party", with mutual friends of yours. Doesn't have to be huge, just a gathering. Have dinner or a BBQ. Huigs and laughter and Fun will come with the party atmosphere. You shouldn't feel awkward if it's a group setting.

Wish him well, tell him to keep in touch, tell him you are proud of him and that someday he & you will find the " right" person and will laugh about your " lil Romance & Break up" 20 years from now..

Finally...

Give him a little gift to remind him you are his friend and you do care....
Something small , it can be something he collects ,like trinkets or theme things .

*** My son collects dragons and swords , he's 23, but even the simplest dragon / sword things make him smile and think of who gave it to him...
*** And I am almost 55 now and still have some things from "friends and ex's ... That still make me smile and remember the " Good Times' "
** Yes I still keep in contact with my Ex's But mainly it is because our romantic/ sexual "love" ended, But our Hearts held the love that brought us into each others lives in the first place.

[m.hendry]

Thank you all for the great advice i will keep this in mind xxx