[yeruite]

ok, well... how do i explain.
firtly i'm a guy, and i am hopeless....


My girlfriend is perfect, she's funny beautiful and i am so lucky, but when she drinks or goes out she flirts a lot,
we have a long distance relationship and so i find it Very difficult to trust her as not only does she flirt a lot she has no idea whats happening and there are a lot of horrid guys out there and i can't be there to look after her!

is there any reason for me to feel like this?! can anyone help if they have any idea's of how i can relax more and feel more comfortable, because if i don't relax i will lose her, and thats the last thing i want...

Thanks,
any advice would be HUGELY appriciated! x

[bec10]

I've ran into this problem myself. Sometimes it's hard when the other person isn't around...I mean you can't not go out and have fun just because you b/f g/f isn't there, that's no way to live. If you're expecting her to not go out at all, then you're in the wrong. But if you're honestly concerned, and you have reason to believe,that she'll cheat on you then maybe you should be worried. How secure is your relationship? Does she know that you feel this way? And just in case you're thinking about it, don't get back at her by trying to make her jealous too, it'll never work if you try that.

[yeruite]

we're totally secure - when she's sober....

its not a big problem, she doesn't drink much, but when she goes out she doesn't have control and flirts which is a bad combination....

i worry not so much she'll cheat on me but, someone will take advantage.. there are some really horrid guys out there!

i think it should be ok, i have never tried to limit her, and never suggested she doesn't go out. i like her having fun and wouldn't want to stop that,
but, i have asked to possbily drink less..
she says she loves me, is it not therefore fair for her to prove it by not flirting and allowing guys to come onto her?? am i really unreasonable?

i can only stop being clingy when i know nothing will happen...
x

[bec10]

If you two are secure with each other, and you've talked about this situation, then you've just got to let her be. If something happens, you'll find out about it and that will be that. I mean, if it happens wouldn't you rather know than not? And if she cheats, then you two just aren't meant to be. You're not being unreasonable, everybody worries when their significant other goes out drinking, but maybe you should just let things take their course.