[CHANDLERS WISH]

Agony Aunt

I'm pleased things worked out for you..

I want you to ponder and ask yourself a question though...

When we say something in the heat of the moment, that's when we are telling ourselves and others the truth....

So, the question I want you to ask yourself, is, did you have such a great time with your younger friends, and others that chatted to you, including guys that you questioned your relationship?

You don't have to answer me, just yourself... and if it's yes, then work towards making it more even or ask yourself if you are really in love..

CW

[Agony_Aunt]

Agony Aunt

I'm pleased things worked out for you..

I want you to ponder and ask yourself a question though...

When we say something in the heat of the moment, that's when we are telling ourselves and others the truth....

So, the question I want you to ask yourself, is, did you have such a great time with your younger friends, and others that chatted to you, including guys that you questioned your relationship?

You don't have to answer me, just yourself... and if it's yes, then work towards making it more even or ask yourself if you are really in love..

CW

I'm glad things were sorted out to.
Something that is wandering around in my head, is why I said that, even though it was in the heat of the moment.
I was told once that speaking when your angry, will always end up with regretting it. But you are right CW, it it 99% of the time, the truth that is said.
I am questioning the relationship although it is something I want very much. But with the whole family thing going on and so on. I'm questioning whether, what I'n doing for this relationship is worth the relationship at all? I know that because there is quite and age gap, there always will be some differences and problems, but I knew that from the start.

But still asking myself now, is it all worth the relationhip?

[CHANDLERS WISH]

As long as you know the road your on, the road your going on and you personally are happy, (forget family), then stay on the road

In this life, we only live once and in that we should be happy..

Our family will always be there, always but at the end of the day, what we do with our lives is our decision as long as we're not hurting anyone...

I think your man knows you may fly the coupe one day, that's why he's forgiven.. He was hurt but he is aware of the age gap and he at this point doesn't want to lose you, but understands and understood what may occur at some time in the future...

What you are doing for this relationship is worth the relationship ... step back a bit if your giving too much and make it more equal...

[Agony_Aunt]

I had a think about what each of us are giving to the relationship. And I feel that I may have more to loose in this relationship.
Because some other people stated in the replies to me, that I chose to go out with girls instead of spending time with him. As he is at the age of really settling down and having a slightly quieter life, does that mean I have to sacrifice some of my youth, for him to enjoy the quieter phase of life now? Even though we have talked before were he realises I actually am still young and I still have to go through phases of my life that he has already went through.
Then my family issue. They have eased back on it now, but I know there is still some resentment about it. As for his family, they have no problems with our relationship. So when I think about it then, I could loose some of my life experiences that I should have at this age and possibly my family. So is it fair to say I have much more to loose than he does by having this relationship, and if I do, is it worth the relationship?

[WildChild]

There are no set timelines in life. Some people are ready to settle down in their early 20s, others still aren't in their 50s. Look at where you are and what you want.

[Agony_Aunt]

Well he is in his late 30's with no kids or anything. He still enjoys going out and so on. I suppose this is a conversation myself and him are going to have.
Over the past year because of my family, we've been trying to get the relationship on track and enjoy it. I guess since things are starting to be a bit easier now, I still want it to be in the all happy new stages and not just suddenly rush in to the whole "settled down" stage.