[ponder_away]

I have an enjoyable day with him. But i feel so undermined all the time.I always get made out to be the total . I can’t help i can’t voice out my opinions clearly compared to him. All I do is talk and when I’m wrong, i get total and payed out even if all i say is sorry and fully acknowledge it. And when he is its just a sorry and I don’t even give him any . I feel inferior, but in a way i am. I never love him any less from this. It’s like i’m continually getting lectured slowly. How should I feel am I reacting to this right? I feel very upset and want to communicate with him less.

[Hopeless Dork]

I am not exactly sure whats going on here... perhaps give an example of what happens ? This board auto deletes curse words and I have a feeling that what may be whats keeping your question from being totally clear...

[jns]

I have an enjoyable day with him. But i feel so undermined all the time.I always get made out to be the total . I can’t help i can’t voice out my opinions clearly compared to him. All I do is talk and when I’m wrong, i get total and payed out even if all i say is sorry and fully acknowledge it. And when he is its just a sorry and I don’t even give him any . I feel inferior, but in a way i am. I never love him any less from this. It’s like i’m continually getting lectured slowly. How should I feel am I reacting to this right? I feel very upset and want to communicate with him less.

Have a face to face talk with him and tell him how it makes you feel when he is this way with you. He may not know how he is making you feel. If you get flustered, write down your arguments and go over them. Even take the notes to the face to face if necessary, but if you do, tell him why and let him look at the notes after getting your arguments out.

Is there a language barrier or a difference in the level of education between you two?

[CHANDLERS WISH]

If you feel that he constantly lectures you, puts you down, makes you feel your always doing something wrong, be-littling you, then he is...

If you feel angry over this, and less and less feelings, not an ounce of love, then it's taken it's toll on you and you have to be strong and true to yourself, knowing you can cope without him in your life, and move on with your life...

No one has the right to "control", bring someone down, so they are totally in-secure and can't express how they are feeling, because they feel if they do, they will be "wrong" and told so, be-littled.....

Stand tall mam.... You are allowed to be totally yourself, .....find someone that loves all of that about you...

CW